Flying off in about 32 hours....wheezing like crazy...God Help me!

Psalm 71:20

Think I have blogged about this in 2005 about how God saved me through my troubles once again. Am so relieved...

"Though You have made me see troubles, many and bitter, You will restore my life again; from the depths of the earth yo will again BRING ME UP."


Just thought of how undeserving I am of God's mercy I am again...
I must really blog about this to once again testify how wonderful God's goodness is...what I share is going to be really sensitive and it can really shake my world so beware....

I have done a major mistake on my part. I have miscalculated my pupils' marks after printing and after generating the report slips. Can't really blame the system for generating the wrong class position. I should have waited. Been rather complacent over the results and have left it at that for a good two weeks.

It was until last night did i want to go check my results slip and the marks sheet.

I was struck green in the face by what I saw and I could not really sleep after that...

The class position were all WRONG. Not tallying with the results slip.

There's this huge sinking feeling you know that you have done something major, some grave big mistake.

I have already informed the parents and asked to the kid to go for rehearsals for prize giving..what to do man?

I did what was the only thing I could do, I prayed.Told GOd how sorry I was and how careless and asking Him to bring me out of the situation with His wisdom and strength...I really could not sleep...went first thing in the morning...told no one except the HOD...I am in serious trouble.

God is really with me all the way, He helped me through the HOD, how he sat down and resolved the issue with me, gave me advice on how to speak to the parents etc...how he urged me to trust in the Lord too. I was so encouraged!

I decided there and then, my ecapism cannot work, I must do something about it. ANd the very first thing i can do is not to let my emotions and feelings affect what the children are facing today. I decided to let them have FUN. I forsaken every worry at the point of time and joked and laughed with the kids. By the time I was done for the morning, the two kids whom I have spoken to have agreed amicably on their change in their class position. Everything went well.

With much trembling I asked the Malay Mother Tongue teacher to be with me as I break the horrifying truth: that their son has not got that class position after all. To my surprise and relief, He was so kind and mentioned, "I know something is wrong, My son did not get as good grades as last semester, he could not have got that position. I understand where you were coming from and I accept!" I so so relieved that I hugged the mother tongue teacher!! Thank goodness he managed to agree upon a "peace offering' for my mistake.

So amazing was God's grace, it all boils down to doing the very least at the very lowest level, was to trust in the Lord and to continue bringing joy to those around me...Thank You Lord! Once again YOU RAISE ME UP...:)

God is amazing! :)

Had a prayer meeting just over the Sunday Morning before service where our leader shared to us on being opportunistic in sharing the Gospel. It can happen ANYWHERE, be it at your workplace, between friends, even in the context of a funeral setting!

Heard an encouraging testimony about my Care leader that he was so opportunistic that at a certain Christian wake, he even took the chance to witness to the people around him! Such was the amazing extent of the burden that he felt for the lost.

Today after service, realised that we had our dear friend LP coming to service by herself! She has been rather close to us for the past one year and I was amazed by how much she wants to come and hear message and the Word of the God! It was such a surprise visit cos she did not sms anyone of us...

GOd bless her heart of wanting to hear the Gospel. May You touch her heart soon...:) AMen!

Now is the time when opportunity arises, there you have a person willing to hear and know more about God...how are you taking your chances today? :)

Realised a possible GRAVE MISTAKE...shuddering as I am typing this..:S

My dear Primary 1s

Realised today that 3 of my P1 pupils are transferring to a new school on the block!

Was so sad that I called them up individually one by one to talk to them to ask them why they are changing school etc. Two of them had said that their parents think that the new school is nearer to their house and they only need to walk unlike their current school which they would have to take a school bus...

I hugged each and everyone individually, Akmal, Yan Qin and Fatima, will miss them so much...such sweet, well-behaved kids...teared a bit la...sigh...

The scary sound of silence...

Have you ever experienced or come across people who simply cannot respond to you even when you talk to them, smile at them? Say things to them at their Mother Tongue?
It wasn't until I entered teaching did I realise just how pampered and protected I am as a kid. I was hardly exposed to people who are just different. My friends are mostly "normal" kids if you can understand what I mean.

WHen I entered into the Primary School classroom, you have kids who cannot read, dyslexic (read letters and words backwards), autistic kids (quiet,or unable to control emotions) ADHD Syndrome (hyperactive children)...kids that just stare at you, deep down into you, at whatever antics you try to pull...They cannot open their mouth to answer. You wonder to yourself, "What's going on in their little minds? Do they comprehend what you are saying? Do they make sense of the sounds that are around them? Especially those that are speech that are coming from people?"

It is scary...some kids I have come across just simply cannot relay what they want to tell me. They come to me every day,....silently, lifting their homework to me, not uttering a single word, or say a word of good morning. All communication is through their eyes and body movement...Kid Z would always come to me, shaking his legs, eyes are on me, that blank motionless stare ...You would have to comprehend to yourself does Kid Z want : A - Go toilet? B - Someone bullying him? C-I forgot to bring my homework or D - I just wanna come up to you and freak you out. Cos, he simply does not answer ANY of my questions of "What's the matter?" or "What do you want?" There were many times when I could not understand what he was trying to say and he actually wetted and soiled his pants a few times...

I am so sorry that I have to say this....I really don't know how to react. It took me a long while to appreciate Kid Z. He had such a sweet, sweet smile. There was this incident that scared me out of my wits, Kid Z had an asthma attack and it was right there in my classroom. He was sobbing from morning 8am to 930am. I was not first-aid trained and I tried to coax him, talk to him, he cannot tell me what was wrong with him. Finally took him to the general office then found out from the first-aidders that through his sobbing he had a faint wheezing sound...It was ASTHMA! Can you imagine you are autistic and you have an attack for a good 1 and half hours and NO ONE KNOWS? This is so scary!!! A matter of life and death in a matter of seconds!
God's grace and protection was certainly on me and that kid then.

Then just yesterday, another same case kid, Kid S came up to me. He could recognise my common commands and instructions and he would repeat them with much enthusiasm, causing everyone in the class to laugh. Kid S came up to me just yesterday "Teacher, I have not finished my work,"pointing to his unfilled worksheet...in the exact same fashion as his group mate E had just done, but the difference is, with a blank face and a mechanic voice.... You really wonder to yourself, does he do it because he recognise patterns and form? Or does he really understand what he's trying to tell me?
The Lord is really teaching me a lesson on how to really love and appreciate kids properly...

Shivers down my spine again...