Saturday, December 30, 2006
Friday, December 22, 2006
3 girls, one most "romantic" night at Changi Beach...
It was one of those days, last Thursday 14th Dec when I decided to have a "chiong" night out with SR and JN. This is so farnie.. a rare chance that I can "jaga" my dad's car and go for a spin. The last time we did that we had so much fun at Serangoon Chomp Chomp where we stuffed ourselves silly.
As usual I was lost again...can never get to JN's place without making a Tour de Tampines and Bedok and Jalan Ubi...yes, I am bad at directions.
Finally got all the lovely ladies in the car, my dear SR was hysterical with laughter at my bad sense of directions and called up JN to complain!! gosh....help me la...I had a wild idea...would drive the girls to Changi Village before driving them to the favourite spots where I used to go for "par tor"(dating). Hahah those were the years man! After a lovely dinner of XO bee hoon and fried san1 lao1 my favourite, we picked up some drinks at Cheers and there we were 3 farnie girls heading for the beach.
I took SR and JN to the spot along Changi beach whereby the planes will fly overhead of you when they are about to land...yes that spot was where I used to go with my past boyfriend years ago. It was a very clear night and we could actually see many stars! Occasionally there were a few shooting stars in the night that left JN and me in awe. Must recommend you all this place at night near the Army jetty, think the guys will know..before you all set off to Pulau Tekong...the planes look like UFO's hovering over the sea in the distance and when they are about to land the whole aircraft will light up like a space ship and fly directly over your head!
SO farnie....our dear SR was not to be romanced in such a manner...she yawned, she went, "You sure that was a shooting star???" To which my explanation is, to people who do not believe in miracles and wonders of nature, you gotta use really down to earth explanation,"OOh that was just a seagull flying very fast past the sky!!!"
As we joked about how easy i was "deceived" by those guys with bikes or cars in the past, actually dating in the past was, I felt rather silly...In your teenage age years you talk about, loving each other forever, you talk about non sequential stuff, such as, "Why do you love me?" , "Am I pretty?", "Are you jealous?"...etc...nothing to build up the other person but just a temporary ego boost. I know many people will disagree with me but how many times have I fallen into the trap of being rather surface in my liking for the person?
Surface? Broad word, for example, "Oh he shares the same interests with me, I think I like him!" , or I go, "Oh, he's sooooo talented!", "He's so cute!"...traps, that are so shallow that I am unable to see beyond the beauty of the person's heart or spirit. Oh that it felt good to have someone to hold your hand again!! I have read quite a number of dating and relationship books and I really think that what matters in a person is really the mind and the heart for God. Can I build up the person? Can I help the person grow closer to God? Am I too dependent on the person that the person cannot seek God? How much does he love God and His word? In the process, I myself must first draw so much closer and intimate with God and before I know this is the person for me.I fell so many times, yet this simple truth from God is so hard to grasp...I am not picky, not too high standards....hahah the ONE has not been revealed yet...
Being single is not easy especially when I get invited to many weddings a year plus invited to play violin in a couple more weddings. Not that I am complaining, its a blessing to be invited, but I do admit that the loneliness do get to me. When's my turn? When's my season under the sun? heheee...I worry, I get frustrated, I get sad...
It's tougher when you have relatives who cannot stop poking at your hurts when they argue that you are too picky in choosing one, you are too fat, too ugly..etc just to name a few la..Dun they understand the power of waiting for the ONE? I can't just take the whole Gin Gang of guys right? These times of struggle are never easy. I keep my mind occupied more with things of Him our Lord Jesus, in perfecting my music skills, in praying more for help and His grace in my life and also most important to help me be strong.
Temptation comes but like a fleeting wind which brushes past your hair and your face... you do not know it but it has already touched you...
*** *** ***
I drove SR and JN along this lovely stretch of the road beside the airport runway where I rolled down the car windows and drove at cruising speed...it was simply lovely...
Lord, help me to be strong when all pressures of the world engulf me. Help me believe in the power of trusting and waiting on the Lord and believe in that You Lord is preparing the one for me if it's Your will. Yet, in my weakness Lord I ask that You will use me, use my hands, to do Your work, give me a bigger heart to love my friends, give me a bigger burden for my lost family and friends. I am treasured, cos I know You treasured me. I am precious cos I know that You Lord would stop at nothing but the best for me. I lay my anxiety, worries and hurts in Your hands.
This is going to be a different year for me Lord ...I know it! Amen!
As usual I was lost again...can never get to JN's place without making a Tour de Tampines and Bedok and Jalan Ubi...yes, I am bad at directions.
Finally got all the lovely ladies in the car, my dear SR was hysterical with laughter at my bad sense of directions and called up JN to complain!! gosh....help me la...I had a wild idea...would drive the girls to Changi Village before driving them to the favourite spots where I used to go for "par tor"(dating). Hahah those were the years man! After a lovely dinner of XO bee hoon and fried san1 lao1 my favourite, we picked up some drinks at Cheers and there we were 3 farnie girls heading for the beach.
I took SR and JN to the spot along Changi beach whereby the planes will fly overhead of you when they are about to land...yes that spot was where I used to go with my past boyfriend years ago. It was a very clear night and we could actually see many stars! Occasionally there were a few shooting stars in the night that left JN and me in awe. Must recommend you all this place at night near the Army jetty, think the guys will know..before you all set off to Pulau Tekong...the planes look like UFO's hovering over the sea in the distance and when they are about to land the whole aircraft will light up like a space ship and fly directly over your head!
SO farnie....our dear SR was not to be romanced in such a manner...she yawned, she went, "You sure that was a shooting star???" To which my explanation is, to people who do not believe in miracles and wonders of nature, you gotta use really down to earth explanation,"OOh that was just a seagull flying very fast past the sky!!!"
As we joked about how easy i was "deceived" by those guys with bikes or cars in the past, actually dating in the past was, I felt rather silly...In your teenage age years you talk about, loving each other forever, you talk about non sequential stuff, such as, "Why do you love me?" , "Am I pretty?", "Are you jealous?"...etc...nothing to build up the other person but just a temporary ego boost. I know many people will disagree with me but how many times have I fallen into the trap of being rather surface in my liking for the person?
Surface? Broad word, for example, "Oh he shares the same interests with me, I think I like him!" , or I go, "Oh, he's sooooo talented!", "He's so cute!"...traps, that are so shallow that I am unable to see beyond the beauty of the person's heart or spirit. Oh that it felt good to have someone to hold your hand again!! I have read quite a number of dating and relationship books and I really think that what matters in a person is really the mind and the heart for God. Can I build up the person? Can I help the person grow closer to God? Am I too dependent on the person that the person cannot seek God? How much does he love God and His word? In the process, I myself must first draw so much closer and intimate with God and before I know this is the person for me.I fell so many times, yet this simple truth from God is so hard to grasp...I am not picky, not too high standards....hahah the ONE has not been revealed yet...
Being single is not easy especially when I get invited to many weddings a year plus invited to play violin in a couple more weddings. Not that I am complaining, its a blessing to be invited, but I do admit that the loneliness do get to me. When's my turn? When's my season under the sun? heheee...I worry, I get frustrated, I get sad...
It's tougher when you have relatives who cannot stop poking at your hurts when they argue that you are too picky in choosing one, you are too fat, too ugly..etc just to name a few la..Dun they understand the power of waiting for the ONE? I can't just take the whole Gin Gang of guys right? These times of struggle are never easy. I keep my mind occupied more with things of Him our Lord Jesus, in perfecting my music skills, in praying more for help and His grace in my life and also most important to help me be strong.
Temptation comes but like a fleeting wind which brushes past your hair and your face... you do not know it but it has already touched you...
*** *** ***
I drove SR and JN along this lovely stretch of the road beside the airport runway where I rolled down the car windows and drove at cruising speed...it was simply lovely...
Lord, help me to be strong when all pressures of the world engulf me. Help me believe in the power of trusting and waiting on the Lord and believe in that You Lord is preparing the one for me if it's Your will. Yet, in my weakness Lord I ask that You will use me, use my hands, to do Your work, give me a bigger heart to love my friends, give me a bigger burden for my lost family and friends. I am treasured, cos I know You treasured me. I am precious cos I know that You Lord would stop at nothing but the best for me. I lay my anxiety, worries and hurts in Your hands.
This is going to be a different year for me Lord ...I know it! Amen!
Monday, December 18, 2006
Taiwan Trip Part 2
When we say GOD is SO GOOD! This phrase never fails to reveal to me what new perspectives of how good GOD is to us.
There is always this period of dryness in any ministry, any person who serves for quite some time and you do not see fruits you get discouraged and disillusioned..
Friends may not respond to you or even want to hear about the reason for your faith in Christ..You feel down, you wanna cry, the people you are overseeing hurts you, you get struck by worry, you struggle to want to let go the problems to go, you want to give up...you see no one running the race with you in something that you are really passionate about, they cannot relate to you why you share so enthusiastically on the things you are willing to sacrifice your time, money and effort into to see that it comes to past...
We all do have that "down" period of times don't we?
That's when I know I gotta slow down and pray, seek God...Do I rely on GOd's standard and timing or on my own? The bible says in Ecclesiastes, there is a time for everything, a season for everything under the sun, and that God's ways are higher than our ways. I fail to understand God too, so the taking a break off everything, to seek God and to ask Him about the purpose about why i am doing all these things healed me.
This trip is definitely therepeutic. I asked God to heal my hurts, tears just flowed, I asked God to give me the grace to love and to forgive despite all the hurts, I marvel at the wonders of His creation and the magnimity of all things including nature. When I saw the sights I saw I was amazed at how once again the simple things of life could actually bring much joy.
This trip has been been a blessing right from the start. Rach Lee had won a Zuji Travel voucher for a trip for 2 to HK which we later change it to Taiwan! Blessing one.
Blessing two. We met all the Hope Taipei bros and sis and they really took so good care of us.
Blessing lost count.. I saw how warm the Taiwanese people are, although I really must say that they way that they "teh" guys and girls alike make me cringe. The shopkeepers will cling onto your arm to thank you for shopping at that place, they like to add a "oh1" at the end of their sentences, they are so civic minded! Students would spring up at their feet when they see elderly board the MRT or bus. No questions asked and they disappear way down into the carriage in their shyness.
There was this one incident which really touched me. There was a group of Koreans sitting near us on the train when one of them started to break out in cold sweat. This father of 3 young girls stopped what he was doing and muttered in his broken English, "Are you okay," to him. Rach Lee helped to translate between the both groups of people what happened and that the guy wanted to help. The Taiwanese father actually wanted to offer the Korean some medicated oil!
Can you imagine such scenes ever happening in Singapore? I was told in horror that Rach had a fren's fren who fainted on the MRT and NO ONE tended to her until she woke up!
They can be so satisfied with the little things in life. All over the places there are night markets when simple games are played such as street basketball, fishing guppies off a small net, shooting water balloons, the Taiwanese crowd all these stalls from playing at these games. I wonder if I had lost in my world of hectic schedules to really appreciate that such simple games could actually bring much joy such as theirs.
Their service is TOP NOTCH! I was at this information counter at Cheng2 Pin3 Bookstore or Eslite BS where I was searching for some Goong1 comics and a particular book by a Chinese author. It was a busy time, the guy there just dropped what he was doing and helped me search all the books I wanted!I was lost in the sections all written in majority traditional chinese.. wow! He even went down to the basement to search the books for me! Many places I went, the people were so service oriented and they were smiling and sincere. Your time and your comfort is important to them as it is important to you.
Hahah i rem we made a joke once among my fellow teacher trainees, what is the most common thing you hear from the service staff in any retail store, say a clothes store and you want to ask for sizes? "IT's ALL THERE ON THE RACK HOR!"
OKay la, we can't compare but it is really the upbringing. Oh yeah one more thing, at the MRT, people actually QUEUE to go into a train! You would get really rude stares if you dun do so and on the escalator, lines are drawn in the middle such that people would have to auto keep right for people to overtake on the left! I remember those times i dread weekends where I had to put my bag in front of me as protection before I can squeeze out of the Singapore MRT or risk get trampled!
wahaha..
Such small things in life...such little wonders that the Lord has shown is to help me see that I am living in too comfortable living conditions that I dun appreciate what I actually have here.
People we are just so so small in this vast world...
Finding God's purpose in my life could be a lifelong process but I am willing and glad that the Lord has placed me here. As Pastor has shared there's a reason for our being here. We are significant.
Recharged , Refreshed, Renewed mind.
READY!
clockwise from TOP LEFT: Hope Taipei bros and sis, Miramar Ferris wheel, YE Liu rock formations, Chang Kai Shek Memorial Hall
Chang Kai Shek Memorial Hall - lovely flowers at the park.
Strong winds at Ye Liu.
Scenic views from the train on the way to Hua Lien. My favourite shot from this trip! :D
There is always this period of dryness in any ministry, any person who serves for quite some time and you do not see fruits you get discouraged and disillusioned..
Friends may not respond to you or even want to hear about the reason for your faith in Christ..You feel down, you wanna cry, the people you are overseeing hurts you, you get struck by worry, you struggle to want to let go the problems to go, you want to give up...you see no one running the race with you in something that you are really passionate about, they cannot relate to you why you share so enthusiastically on the things you are willing to sacrifice your time, money and effort into to see that it comes to past...
We all do have that "down" period of times don't we?
That's when I know I gotta slow down and pray, seek God...Do I rely on GOd's standard and timing or on my own? The bible says in Ecclesiastes, there is a time for everything, a season for everything under the sun, and that God's ways are higher than our ways. I fail to understand God too, so the taking a break off everything, to seek God and to ask Him about the purpose about why i am doing all these things healed me.
This trip is definitely therepeutic. I asked God to heal my hurts, tears just flowed, I asked God to give me the grace to love and to forgive despite all the hurts, I marvel at the wonders of His creation and the magnimity of all things including nature. When I saw the sights I saw I was amazed at how once again the simple things of life could actually bring much joy.
This trip has been been a blessing right from the start. Rach Lee had won a Zuji Travel voucher for a trip for 2 to HK which we later change it to Taiwan! Blessing one.
Blessing two. We met all the Hope Taipei bros and sis and they really took so good care of us.
Blessing lost count.. I saw how warm the Taiwanese people are, although I really must say that they way that they "teh" guys and girls alike make me cringe. The shopkeepers will cling onto your arm to thank you for shopping at that place, they like to add a "oh1" at the end of their sentences, they are so civic minded! Students would spring up at their feet when they see elderly board the MRT or bus. No questions asked and they disappear way down into the carriage in their shyness.
There was this one incident which really touched me. There was a group of Koreans sitting near us on the train when one of them started to break out in cold sweat. This father of 3 young girls stopped what he was doing and muttered in his broken English, "Are you okay," to him. Rach Lee helped to translate between the both groups of people what happened and that the guy wanted to help. The Taiwanese father actually wanted to offer the Korean some medicated oil!
Can you imagine such scenes ever happening in Singapore? I was told in horror that Rach had a fren's fren who fainted on the MRT and NO ONE tended to her until she woke up!
They can be so satisfied with the little things in life. All over the places there are night markets when simple games are played such as street basketball, fishing guppies off a small net, shooting water balloons, the Taiwanese crowd all these stalls from playing at these games. I wonder if I had lost in my world of hectic schedules to really appreciate that such simple games could actually bring much joy such as theirs.
Their service is TOP NOTCH! I was at this information counter at Cheng2 Pin3 Bookstore or Eslite BS where I was searching for some Goong1 comics and a particular book by a Chinese author. It was a busy time, the guy there just dropped what he was doing and helped me search all the books I wanted!I was lost in the sections all written in majority traditional chinese.. wow! He even went down to the basement to search the books for me! Many places I went, the people were so service oriented and they were smiling and sincere. Your time and your comfort is important to them as it is important to you.
Hahah i rem we made a joke once among my fellow teacher trainees, what is the most common thing you hear from the service staff in any retail store, say a clothes store and you want to ask for sizes? "IT's ALL THERE ON THE RACK HOR!"
OKay la, we can't compare but it is really the upbringing. Oh yeah one more thing, at the MRT, people actually QUEUE to go into a train! You would get really rude stares if you dun do so and on the escalator, lines are drawn in the middle such that people would have to auto keep right for people to overtake on the left! I remember those times i dread weekends where I had to put my bag in front of me as protection before I can squeeze out of the Singapore MRT or risk get trampled!
wahaha..
Such small things in life...such little wonders that the Lord has shown is to help me see that I am living in too comfortable living conditions that I dun appreciate what I actually have here.
People we are just so so small in this vast world...
Finding God's purpose in my life could be a lifelong process but I am willing and glad that the Lord has placed me here. As Pastor has shared there's a reason for our being here. We are significant.
Recharged , Refreshed, Renewed mind.
READY!
clockwise from TOP LEFT: Hope Taipei bros and sis, Miramar Ferris wheel, YE Liu rock formations, Chang Kai Shek Memorial Hall
Chang Kai Shek Memorial Hall - lovely flowers at the park.
Strong winds at Ye Liu.
Scenic views from the train on the way to Hua Lien. My favourite shot from this trip! :D
Friday, December 15, 2006
Taiwan Trip Part 1
Was really looking forward to this trip...although it went through many hiccups in the planning and eventual setting off...I am glad that I am flying off after all. But sad to say...I have to forgo the Stand Chart Run that I trained so hard all these months!!!!! *sob* SOb*! The flights were all full and there was no way I could change the flights....
Badly wanted to go on a Sabbatical....too many things happened in the past one year plus months and weeks of sleepless, restless nights...enough is enough...I need a break or I will go crazy. Being rather high-strung, I find it hard to let go and relax sometimes...I would try to do something, I would attempt to try to solve things myself...there it was..red warning light from God...I gotta rest and see the world...get my perspectives renewed.
God never let you go.
No matter where you try to hide, He speaks to you, He makes sure you get it. NO matter the language. I was amazed myself at the Hope Taipei service where dear GOd spoke to me to love despite all the hurts and unforgiveness I am facing as a follower of Christ. The praise and worship, sermon, even the Bible was in Traditional Chinese, "fan2 di4" but the LORD spoke....He spoke right into my heart...it was simply beautiful...the next thing I knew I stood up...vision blurred by tears...
God soothed me and made me realise His awesomeness through this trip and I encourage all to really travel to if possible go for missions to experience the different lifestyles and culture of people around the world. Once again I was touched by the things and sights that I saw.
You gotta try travelling. Not too often la...hahah once in while is good...
Poy prayed about us meeting new friends, indeed the trip is blessed with many friends, friends from different nationalities..on the flight to Taiwan, I met a Taiwanese man, named Daniel Kuo, train to Hua Lien, I met Myong Sook, a Korean gal travelling with her parents, on the flight back I met Mr Tan, a filter company co-boss..
It's amazing how God placed people beside me when I was wanting to rest and relax. I din get to sleep much despite my heavy head and droopy eyes! The people just appeared out of nowhere and I chatted with them for hours!!! Gift of missions? Amen?
More testimonies coming up...watch this space
First night at Taiwan! Shilin Night Market...met up with How Joo, CK, Peiks and Emma!
Striking a "model" pose at the Taipei subway...wahahahaha...its cold!
Eating Ma2 La4 Huo3 Guo1 with Hope Taipei bros and sisters, Sister Jessica, Pastor Maria, Bro Caleb and sis Stella!
Lovely view of the night sky after our HotSpring Bath at Yang Ming Shan!
Badly wanted to go on a Sabbatical....too many things happened in the past one year plus months and weeks of sleepless, restless nights...enough is enough...I need a break or I will go crazy. Being rather high-strung, I find it hard to let go and relax sometimes...I would try to do something, I would attempt to try to solve things myself...there it was..red warning light from God...I gotta rest and see the world...get my perspectives renewed.
God never let you go.
No matter where you try to hide, He speaks to you, He makes sure you get it. NO matter the language. I was amazed myself at the Hope Taipei service where dear GOd spoke to me to love despite all the hurts and unforgiveness I am facing as a follower of Christ. The praise and worship, sermon, even the Bible was in Traditional Chinese, "fan2 di4" but the LORD spoke....He spoke right into my heart...it was simply beautiful...the next thing I knew I stood up...vision blurred by tears...
God soothed me and made me realise His awesomeness through this trip and I encourage all to really travel to if possible go for missions to experience the different lifestyles and culture of people around the world. Once again I was touched by the things and sights that I saw.
You gotta try travelling. Not too often la...hahah once in while is good...
Poy prayed about us meeting new friends, indeed the trip is blessed with many friends, friends from different nationalities..on the flight to Taiwan, I met a Taiwanese man, named Daniel Kuo, train to Hua Lien, I met Myong Sook, a Korean gal travelling with her parents, on the flight back I met Mr Tan, a filter company co-boss..
It's amazing how God placed people beside me when I was wanting to rest and relax. I din get to sleep much despite my heavy head and droopy eyes! The people just appeared out of nowhere and I chatted with them for hours!!! Gift of missions? Amen?
More testimonies coming up...watch this space
First night at Taiwan! Shilin Night Market...met up with How Joo, CK, Peiks and Emma!
Striking a "model" pose at the Taipei subway...wahahahaha...its cold!
Eating Ma2 La4 Huo3 Guo1 with Hope Taipei bros and sisters, Sister Jessica, Pastor Maria, Bro Caleb and sis Stella!
Lovely view of the night sky after our HotSpring Bath at Yang Ming Shan!
Sunday, December 10, 2006
Pic Collage of Taiwan Trip 2nd Dec to 8th Dec 2006
Went for a mini "Sabbatical" trip with Rach Lee to Taiwan and came back just last night before starting my whirlwind kinda life in Singapore again..Those 7 days were definitely well spent, refocusing and recharge before embarking on another round of activities and much performances and services. Shall blog more soon...watch this space...
Friday, December 01, 2006
Monday, November 27, 2006
Pray with a glad and sincere heart...
How do I leave...?
Do I go....?
...............................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
How do I leave...?
Do I go....?
...............................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
Sunday, November 26, 2006
Pics of my "idols" continued...
Hugh Jackman, ah, another fine gentleman, our dear Wolverine! He cuts a very suave and dashing image whenever he's on screen. A real eye candy!
Dr. Vivien Balakrishnan! I actually shook hands with him once! I rem it was one of those Generation Acts Club activities when we invited him to Orchard Hotel for a Youth Forum. Those who can rem that event that's in 2003! I admire his charm and cause for youth development.
Wang Lee Hom, I listen to a lot of R & B songs and he is in the same ranks as David Tao and of course Jay Chou! I told my sis once, you just have to look at his profile and he's so good looking! A very talented guy, plays at least 5 instruments I heard.
Jay Chou! Jay Chou! Am crazy over him. I think I blogged about this before. Yes, he's the typical "beng" but he's cool.:P Quite a character la this guy, been asked this question by Mr D before if put Wang Lee Hom and Jay Chou together which one would I pick? I told him Jay Chou of course! although Lee Hom would probably talk to me more la....
Okay one of those bo liao posting...:P Trying to boost myself a bit la...
Pics of my "idols"
Thought this is rather farnie after WAM music practice that night when IZ blurt out to Fenn, "You all are too into idolatry!" Such a strong word! :P We were teasing him about why the WANG LEE HOM CD was so wet after he came out of the washroom...the gals all complained that IZ did not know how to take care of the CD.
OKay....shall post about my past "idols" when I was growing up...some of them still make me goo-goo ga ga over them la...Jesus for example...:D
in the 1980s
Who could forget Aaron Kwok? My pri sch and sec school craze... I searched the Net for the old pic of him! haha i think the signature hand gestures "dui ni ai ai ai by waaaaan" still rings among all of us.:P
Jin Chen Wu, Takeshi Kaneshiro. Wah this guy still makes me smile la, Can you all believe it? I have caught most of his movies, all the Jap Dramas...be it they are flops or not.His features are so pretty! :P
Kimura Takuya, yeah another Jap guy, was a super Jap drama fanatic! Watched a lot of Jap drams and listened to SMAP songs then back in early uni days la...You all know that "SMAP" stands for "Sports and Music Assemble People"?
Anthony Hopkins! This guy is a classic. I love the way he speaks, very gentlemanly, very "English" loved thespian actors, they really can put in emotions and expressions into their work. Weird taste I have...
To be continued...
OKay....shall post about my past "idols" when I was growing up...some of them still make me goo-goo ga ga over them la...Jesus for example...:D
in the 1980s
Who could forget Aaron Kwok? My pri sch and sec school craze... I searched the Net for the old pic of him! haha i think the signature hand gestures "dui ni ai ai ai by waaaaan" still rings among all of us.:P
Jin Chen Wu, Takeshi Kaneshiro. Wah this guy still makes me smile la, Can you all believe it? I have caught most of his movies, all the Jap Dramas...be it they are flops or not.His features are so pretty! :P
Kimura Takuya, yeah another Jap guy, was a super Jap drama fanatic! Watched a lot of Jap drams and listened to SMAP songs then back in early uni days la...You all know that "SMAP" stands for "Sports and Music Assemble People"?
Anthony Hopkins! This guy is a classic. I love the way he speaks, very gentlemanly, very "English" loved thespian actors, they really can put in emotions and expressions into their work. Weird taste I have...
To be continued...
Thursday, November 23, 2006
To You Alone
This is another gem, we have not sung it before, from the Hillsongs Album "For All You've Done" Disc 2
This song really spoke to me a lot recently and been singing it quite a lot...enjoy!
To You Alone
Reuben Morgan
Key: G
Verse 1:
D/C C G/B
Every knee will bow
D/C C G/B
And every tongue con - fess
Bb F/A
Jesus Christ is Lord
Dsus D
Lord and King
Chorus:
G Cmaj7
All glory to Your Name
Am7 D C/G G
All honor to Your majesty
D/E Em Asus A
Forever Forever
G/D C Dsus D
All praise to You alone
Verse 2:
Every eye will see
And every heart will know
The beauty of the Lord
And all the earth
Other:
D/C C G/B D/C C G/B Bb F/A Dsus D
Ending:
G/B C D
All praise to You alone
©2003 Hillsong Publishing (Admin. in U.S. & Canada by Integrity's Hosanna! Music)
All rights reserved. International copyright secured.
CCLI song #4257796
This song really spoke to me a lot recently and been singing it quite a lot...enjoy!
To You Alone
Reuben Morgan
Key: G
Verse 1:
D/C C G/B
Every knee will bow
D/C C G/B
And every tongue con - fess
Bb F/A
Jesus Christ is Lord
Dsus D
Lord and King
Chorus:
G Cmaj7
All glory to Your Name
Am7 D C/G G
All honor to Your majesty
D/E Em Asus A
Forever Forever
G/D C Dsus D
All praise to You alone
Verse 2:
Every eye will see
And every heart will know
The beauty of the Lord
And all the earth
Other:
D/C C G/B D/C C G/B Bb F/A Dsus D
Ending:
G/B C D
All praise to You alone
©2003 Hillsong Publishing (Admin. in U.S. & Canada by Integrity's Hosanna! Music)
All rights reserved. International copyright secured.
CCLI song #4257796
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
NIE class outing
Picture of some the gals from my English SK class!
The group of NIE trainees who went down Sentosa 20th Nov 2006! Exams over!
Monday, November 20, 2006
Measured against a yardstick
I think we all suffer sometimes a bit of the being "judgmental sickness".
I have a lot of expectations on my family members, my sistas, my close friends and sometimes, when they say or do something that's out of my familar "yardstick of tolerance" for them, I get hurt and upset.
I get frustrated when my mum expects a lot out of me especially now I am hardly at home, sometimes she just demands that I spend more time with her which I could already hardly draw out time to sleep. I have tried to make it home at least two nights a week for meals just to spend time with her and I have to admit, its really tiring...sometimes just don't know how to please her. That already is measuring my mum against some standard that I have, place her on the hot seat, argue that she's not caring enough for me...
My "judgmental sickness" shows up again among my close frens, when every word they say are weighed on my personal scale. Recently some events, over things some close fren had said to me in the face got me so upset and heartache that I begin to wonder, Have I been measuring my friends with the same yardsitck too? How do I measure the expectations on myself then? Am I too relaxed with myself and strict with others?
After service today, our group went out to watch "Casino Royale" and sat down at a Kopi Tiam for drinks...the group whose majority was made up of guys went one round of talking about the kinda gals that they cannot stand, cos we were on the posting of my blog on guys...
I fit into all their descriptions of girls that they cannot stand! wahahahahaa...
Loud.
Chor2 Lor4
Squeaky.
Not wen1 rou2.
Just to name a few la...the most they say, the more I sink into my chair... Not to say that I am wanting to be in their good books la, but I really feel that I am being too judgmental on others, how I view others is not the same that I view myself... double standards la...I can be so harsh on the people I love and those who love me but NOT on myself. Everything I do seems to cover up neatly.
Lord, I pray for You to help me see people through the eyes of Love that You hold. Help me to exercise my grace on others and to put my loved ones and friends through Your yardstick and not mine alone. Help me not be so judgmental and cynical and so harsh with the people around me. Guard my tongue, my speech, my actions that the people around me would not be hurt or disappointed. Help me to love, love with the same love cos You first loved us.Unmask and unscale my eyes from my coloured and narrow vision and replace them with a new perspective that You want me to see.
I pray for Your forgiveness to me when I judge and hurt people. I pray for Your Holy Spirit to guide and lead me. In Jesus Name I pray, Amen!
I have a lot of expectations on my family members, my sistas, my close friends and sometimes, when they say or do something that's out of my familar "yardstick of tolerance" for them, I get hurt and upset.
I get frustrated when my mum expects a lot out of me especially now I am hardly at home, sometimes she just demands that I spend more time with her which I could already hardly draw out time to sleep. I have tried to make it home at least two nights a week for meals just to spend time with her and I have to admit, its really tiring...sometimes just don't know how to please her. That already is measuring my mum against some standard that I have, place her on the hot seat, argue that she's not caring enough for me...
My "judgmental sickness" shows up again among my close frens, when every word they say are weighed on my personal scale. Recently some events, over things some close fren had said to me in the face got me so upset and heartache that I begin to wonder, Have I been measuring my friends with the same yardsitck too? How do I measure the expectations on myself then? Am I too relaxed with myself and strict with others?
After service today, our group went out to watch "Casino Royale" and sat down at a Kopi Tiam for drinks...the group whose majority was made up of guys went one round of talking about the kinda gals that they cannot stand, cos we were on the posting of my blog on guys...
I fit into all their descriptions of girls that they cannot stand! wahahahahaa...
Loud.
Chor2 Lor4
Squeaky.
Not wen1 rou2.
Just to name a few la...the most they say, the more I sink into my chair... Not to say that I am wanting to be in their good books la, but I really feel that I am being too judgmental on others, how I view others is not the same that I view myself... double standards la...I can be so harsh on the people I love and those who love me but NOT on myself. Everything I do seems to cover up neatly.
Lord, I pray for You to help me see people through the eyes of Love that You hold. Help me to exercise my grace on others and to put my loved ones and friends through Your yardstick and not mine alone. Help me not be so judgmental and cynical and so harsh with the people around me. Guard my tongue, my speech, my actions that the people around me would not be hurt or disappointed. Help me to love, love with the same love cos You first loved us.Unmask and unscale my eyes from my coloured and narrow vision and replace them with a new perspective that You want me to see.
I pray for Your forgiveness to me when I judge and hurt people. I pray for Your Holy Spirit to guide and lead me. In Jesus Name I pray, Amen!
Thursday, November 16, 2006
Absolute Zero
This must be one of the low points in my life.
In the past two months since Oct-Nov, I don't know how many times I have shed tears over people, over school, over situation.
Do they care that you shed tears for them? Only God is the Comforter really.
Heartache.
Pain.
Dizziness.
MISUNDERSTOOD!
Mostly heartache - cos the pain is so great that you can't treat it physically - only by prayer. Prayer for God to heal and to soothe...
God help me!
In the past two months since Oct-Nov, I don't know how many times I have shed tears over people, over school, over situation.
Do they care that you shed tears for them? Only God is the Comforter really.
Heartache.
Pain.
Dizziness.
MISUNDERSTOOD!
Mostly heartache - cos the pain is so great that you can't treat it physically - only by prayer. Prayer for God to heal and to soothe...
God help me!
Monday, November 13, 2006
GOT Challenge?
Sigh...finally I am in a mood to blog this down...got this challenge sometime back din have time to write it down...read Tricia's and IZ's blogs about guys and girls...GOt a challenge from IZ about what about guys that make me mad...okay I am so going to get rap from the guys reading this blog also...but only my personal comments la...hope you all dun mind...
What are the few things about guys that makes me mad / cannot stand??
Okay...before I say anything...I am not perfect also, I am loud, terribly loud, chor lor, not exactly a girl, more a guy-girl kinda person, I have my bad points too...my dad la, brought me up to be tough like a guy :P So there are also people and events in my life that shaped me to who I am today..I have ideals also...ideals of what a guy should be like...so here's really what makes me tick:-
Brace yourself.
I cannot stand it when guys:-
1) Are TOTALLY UNgentlemanly
I mean, these are the folks who fight with ladies literally up the buses, MRT, lifts. They do NOT give way even though you may be lugging an instrument, carrying a kid, lotsa books or groceries, I have seen it myself, This guy on the MRT saw this poor pregnant lady walk in and immediately "fall asleep" AWWW come on!
Do you really need to be first up the bus or MRT? How heavy is the lift door or door that you can't hold it for us when you go out? sigh...No la, I am not asking you to help me carry things when you see me lugging many stuff, but i feel that its really basic courtesy to help us get that door? aiyoh....
Oh yeah, another trend... you want us to follow you when you lead the way, please walk slower. No, i do not wear high heels, we do walk slower so if you really need to be in the lead, please walk slower, how can we know where are we headed if you guys are leading 30 yards away? Not everyone has a longer perspective like me being quite tall...
Singapore guys...must work harder, I share from a personal experience, there was this "ang moh" one fine day I was taking a cab to church, he was in the cab paying for the fare before I got on. He got outta the cab, smiled a big smile at me, "Good morning!", opened the cab door for me to get on and closed the door for me!
That's Gentleman-liness 101 for you! Look,I don't even know him!
I rem that particular service I kept smiling thru and thru...:) lil' acts of kindness la...
2) Are totally indecisive
This point I echo Tricia's comments. Please do make decisions on your own also. Some ladies in general already cannot be the decision maker around, so I believe that's what God has called man to do, to lead the woman! OK, if you want us to give opinion or suggestions to what to wear, or what to eat for example or what hair colour to put on, we would give you our two cents worth. Please don't get mad or irritated when we choose something that is totally off what you think and that you may have already decided upon in the first place? Then again, you already went one big round to justify what you have already decided in the first place, then sorry ah may I ask, why still ask us? Sigh...
3) Have little habits that stick to them , even in public
OK, everyone has habits, this i agree, I was a cleanliness freak until God changed me! wahhaah...I have seen guys, picking their noses, digging their ears and yes, scratch.....that was the ultimate! I was an Usher in Hope for a good 4 years plus before moving on to the music ministry. Those early days I really struggle shaking hands with so many ppl at one go! You have clammy hands, wet hands, sticky hands, you name it yupps I have shaken them all!
Like I said, everyone can have these habits,me included, please restrict the display of these habits to the washroom? Thanks...and oh yeah, wash up after you are done...:)
4) Have an ego so big that it hurts people
Face it. Guys do have an ego. Not all guys are exertive and being too ego-istic. But they do have it. Sometimes in an argument, when things do not turn out your way, not by our doing of course or when it turns out that you are in the wrong, please do not argue that you are right or there's a better way to do it, or we should have gone around and do it your way. Most of the time, we do not want to win that argument, we just want to hear you say "Sorry, I have raised my voice..." or simply just "Sorry". Many times, we are more hurt by the guy trying to exert their rights over the matter that we could keep silent over it.
Does it hurt so much to really apologise? We get more mad in the process when that happens when a guy insists of getting his point across...most of the time for me la, I would just turn away and switch off.
5) Another aspect of the guy's ego is the inexplicable nature of wanting to impress.
Aiyee..I get my hair stand when I see one like that. I dunno, call me weird but I not impressed by how well you can speak that language, or your business accolates, the list of achievements you have, how well you dress, the who's who that you know...just to name a few..
What I really do appreciate in a guy is his quiet spirit,humility, the depths and maturity of his mind over matter. His talents could be seen screaming from his very being - yet, he does nothing to accentuate it. Believe me, there are guys like that. THAT is impressive. Am still bowled over by them when I see them around...heee heee...
6) Think they are every girl's dream guy / resident hunk
Still on ego.
I can't help but keep smiling at this next comment, but there are guys who think that they are every gal's dream or resident hunk and they believe it. They go around chatting up with girls, turn on the "impress mode" and gets really hyped up with getting their attention. I do admit that some of them are really good looking but sad to say...it does't work for me.
I always tell my group's guys, its not the looks or how big your muscles is. What girls look out for is the sincerity and pureness of the heart. You don't have to look like Takeshi Kaneshiro (Jin Chen Wu) or Brad Pitt to get the girl's heart. God will make you shine in front of THE ONE...:P
7) Are very impatient
I am someone who can be quite slow in articulating myself especially when I make decisions,other times I can be quite a fast-talker. I talk a lot of incoherent things. I take time to decide and take time to walk from Place A to B.
Let's take shopping for example.We ladies like to shop around for a particular good, comfy pair of shoes before we buy them. We compare prices, we listen to comments, we would want to try out different varieties of shoes...that's an example of how we make decisions, using a graphic representation la.
Be patient okay? Good things come to those who wait...
I think I shall stop here for today otherwise I would not hear the end of this. I have to add that NOT all ladies are what I have described above. We are all very different.
Now these are what make me tick! Right back at ya, IZ! :P
What are the few things about guys that makes me mad / cannot stand??
Okay...before I say anything...I am not perfect also, I am loud, terribly loud, chor lor, not exactly a girl, more a guy-girl kinda person, I have my bad points too...my dad la, brought me up to be tough like a guy :P So there are also people and events in my life that shaped me to who I am today..I have ideals also...ideals of what a guy should be like...so here's really what makes me tick:-
Brace yourself.
I cannot stand it when guys:-
1) Are TOTALLY UNgentlemanly
I mean, these are the folks who fight with ladies literally up the buses, MRT, lifts. They do NOT give way even though you may be lugging an instrument, carrying a kid, lotsa books or groceries, I have seen it myself, This guy on the MRT saw this poor pregnant lady walk in and immediately "fall asleep" AWWW come on!
Do you really need to be first up the bus or MRT? How heavy is the lift door or door that you can't hold it for us when you go out? sigh...No la, I am not asking you to help me carry things when you see me lugging many stuff, but i feel that its really basic courtesy to help us get that door? aiyoh....
Oh yeah, another trend... you want us to follow you when you lead the way, please walk slower. No, i do not wear high heels, we do walk slower so if you really need to be in the lead, please walk slower, how can we know where are we headed if you guys are leading 30 yards away? Not everyone has a longer perspective like me being quite tall...
Singapore guys...must work harder, I share from a personal experience, there was this "ang moh" one fine day I was taking a cab to church, he was in the cab paying for the fare before I got on. He got outta the cab, smiled a big smile at me, "Good morning!", opened the cab door for me to get on and closed the door for me!
That's Gentleman-liness 101 for you! Look,I don't even know him!
I rem that particular service I kept smiling thru and thru...:) lil' acts of kindness la...
2) Are totally indecisive
This point I echo Tricia's comments. Please do make decisions on your own also. Some ladies in general already cannot be the decision maker around, so I believe that's what God has called man to do, to lead the woman! OK, if you want us to give opinion or suggestions to what to wear, or what to eat for example or what hair colour to put on, we would give you our two cents worth. Please don't get mad or irritated when we choose something that is totally off what you think and that you may have already decided upon in the first place? Then again, you already went one big round to justify what you have already decided in the first place, then sorry ah may I ask, why still ask us? Sigh...
3) Have little habits that stick to them , even in public
OK, everyone has habits, this i agree, I was a cleanliness freak until God changed me! wahhaah...I have seen guys, picking their noses, digging their ears and yes, scratch.....that was the ultimate! I was an Usher in Hope for a good 4 years plus before moving on to the music ministry. Those early days I really struggle shaking hands with so many ppl at one go! You have clammy hands, wet hands, sticky hands, you name it yupps I have shaken them all!
Like I said, everyone can have these habits,me included, please restrict the display of these habits to the washroom? Thanks...and oh yeah, wash up after you are done...:)
4) Have an ego so big that it hurts people
Face it. Guys do have an ego. Not all guys are exertive and being too ego-istic. But they do have it. Sometimes in an argument, when things do not turn out your way, not by our doing of course or when it turns out that you are in the wrong, please do not argue that you are right or there's a better way to do it, or we should have gone around and do it your way. Most of the time, we do not want to win that argument, we just want to hear you say "Sorry, I have raised my voice..." or simply just "Sorry". Many times, we are more hurt by the guy trying to exert their rights over the matter that we could keep silent over it.
Does it hurt so much to really apologise? We get more mad in the process when that happens when a guy insists of getting his point across...most of the time for me la, I would just turn away and switch off.
5) Another aspect of the guy's ego is the inexplicable nature of wanting to impress.
Aiyee..I get my hair stand when I see one like that. I dunno, call me weird but I not impressed by how well you can speak that language, or your business accolates, the list of achievements you have, how well you dress, the who's who that you know...just to name a few..
What I really do appreciate in a guy is his quiet spirit,humility, the depths and maturity of his mind over matter. His talents could be seen screaming from his very being - yet, he does nothing to accentuate it. Believe me, there are guys like that. THAT is impressive. Am still bowled over by them when I see them around...heee heee...
6) Think they are every girl's dream guy / resident hunk
Still on ego.
I can't help but keep smiling at this next comment, but there are guys who think that they are every gal's dream or resident hunk and they believe it. They go around chatting up with girls, turn on the "impress mode" and gets really hyped up with getting their attention. I do admit that some of them are really good looking but sad to say...it does't work for me.
I always tell my group's guys, its not the looks or how big your muscles is. What girls look out for is the sincerity and pureness of the heart. You don't have to look like Takeshi Kaneshiro (Jin Chen Wu) or Brad Pitt to get the girl's heart. God will make you shine in front of THE ONE...:P
7) Are very impatient
I am someone who can be quite slow in articulating myself especially when I make decisions,other times I can be quite a fast-talker. I talk a lot of incoherent things. I take time to decide and take time to walk from Place A to B.
Let's take shopping for example.We ladies like to shop around for a particular good, comfy pair of shoes before we buy them. We compare prices, we listen to comments, we would want to try out different varieties of shoes...that's an example of how we make decisions, using a graphic representation la.
Be patient okay? Good things come to those who wait...
I think I shall stop here for today otherwise I would not hear the end of this. I have to add that NOT all ladies are what I have described above. We are all very different.
Now these are what make me tick! Right back at ya, IZ! :P
Saturday, November 11, 2006
Monday, November 06, 2006
A humanitarian approach towards Euthanasia?
It was actually a very fun-filled and joyous day with much laughter and salt water after our unit event at Sentosa Palawan Beach.
I got home only to hear from my dad that my uncle is terminally ill with lymphatic cancer and he is given only a few days to live...The depth of the severity of his condition only then sank in. I was afraid. This is like close to immediate family already and my parents especially my dad was really affected and sad. I was at a loss...another wave of hard testing again, I called my UL GR for help. My uncle could only speak Cantonese and Hainanese, me my broken Canto cannot even buy me a bowl of noodles let alone share Christ..sigh... GR was very kind to offer to go down with me to pray for him, but after much deliberation from my mum and struggling the whole night without much sleep...I think it was best that I went alone...
On the way to service, I had prayed,"God how? My uncle is not saved! My Cantonese how? God...help!" I prayed for my uncle's salvation and for God to speak to me how I should go to pray for my uncle or not, despite knowing i would definitely get the brunt of all the persecution and condemnation if I go and pray boldly for him. God gave me this verse:
"Dear friends, if our hearts do not condemn us, we have confidence before God and receive from him everything we ask, because we obey His commands and do what pleases Him."
~ 1 John 3:21-22
I knew it was God's confirmation for me to go ahead and pray in courage and boldness.
I went there, I was surrounded by relatives, there was not a quiet moment, I kept praying in my heart. Then suddenly, I was alone with my uncle and another cousin, I know that I have only moments to act...
I laid my hands on his hand, "Gu Jeong, (Uncle) wo hai Da bao...(I'm Dabao, my baby moniker)" I prayed in my heart for God to speak to him in his head, let him hear God's voice, cos what I witnessed was so heart wrenching...tubes all stuck to him, life support system...the signboard which read "NOTHING by Mouth" loomed over his head, I nearly cried. His head was turning left and right, eyes tightly shut, mouth open gasping for air, hands struggling to take off the tubes...Sometimes, when you see your loved ones, fighting to live on struggling with so much pain, I began to think that euthanasia is really humanitarian after all, all the rounds of chemo and treatment only caused more and more pain on my uncle. I prayed also for God take away his pain...
I prayed. I prayed silently for God to help him respond to me if my uncle could hear His voice and respond to me so that I could share more for his salvation. There...it happened...for that moment 10 seconds, my uncle opened his eyes turned his head and looked at me, with tears in his eyes, he turned to where I was standing....just as I finished praying...that 10 secs...I knew God was speaking to him..to me it was really a moment with him and God....i was shocked and stunned....then he went off again...i lost him in his semi-comatose state...
It was only 10 seconds, but to me it was a great leap of my faith level and the trust to just take God at His word and follow.. I was amazed at what God can do...
I hope that I would have a chance to see my uncle again and ask God for His grace to help me pray for his salvation...I have only that much time...
Pray with me please...
I got home only to hear from my dad that my uncle is terminally ill with lymphatic cancer and he is given only a few days to live...The depth of the severity of his condition only then sank in. I was afraid. This is like close to immediate family already and my parents especially my dad was really affected and sad. I was at a loss...another wave of hard testing again, I called my UL GR for help. My uncle could only speak Cantonese and Hainanese, me my broken Canto cannot even buy me a bowl of noodles let alone share Christ..sigh... GR was very kind to offer to go down with me to pray for him, but after much deliberation from my mum and struggling the whole night without much sleep...I think it was best that I went alone...
On the way to service, I had prayed,"God how? My uncle is not saved! My Cantonese how? God...help!" I prayed for my uncle's salvation and for God to speak to me how I should go to pray for my uncle or not, despite knowing i would definitely get the brunt of all the persecution and condemnation if I go and pray boldly for him. God gave me this verse:
"Dear friends, if our hearts do not condemn us, we have confidence before God and receive from him everything we ask, because we obey His commands and do what pleases Him."
~ 1 John 3:21-22
I knew it was God's confirmation for me to go ahead and pray in courage and boldness.
I went there, I was surrounded by relatives, there was not a quiet moment, I kept praying in my heart. Then suddenly, I was alone with my uncle and another cousin, I know that I have only moments to act...
I laid my hands on his hand, "Gu Jeong, (Uncle) wo hai Da bao...(I'm Dabao, my baby moniker)" I prayed in my heart for God to speak to him in his head, let him hear God's voice, cos what I witnessed was so heart wrenching...tubes all stuck to him, life support system...the signboard which read "NOTHING by Mouth" loomed over his head, I nearly cried. His head was turning left and right, eyes tightly shut, mouth open gasping for air, hands struggling to take off the tubes...Sometimes, when you see your loved ones, fighting to live on struggling with so much pain, I began to think that euthanasia is really humanitarian after all, all the rounds of chemo and treatment only caused more and more pain on my uncle. I prayed also for God take away his pain...
I prayed. I prayed silently for God to help him respond to me if my uncle could hear His voice and respond to me so that I could share more for his salvation. There...it happened...for that moment 10 seconds, my uncle opened his eyes turned his head and looked at me, with tears in his eyes, he turned to where I was standing....just as I finished praying...that 10 secs...I knew God was speaking to him..to me it was really a moment with him and God....i was shocked and stunned....then he went off again...i lost him in his semi-comatose state...
It was only 10 seconds, but to me it was a great leap of my faith level and the trust to just take God at His word and follow.. I was amazed at what God can do...
I hope that I would have a chance to see my uncle again and ask God for His grace to help me pray for his salvation...I have only that much time...
Pray with me please...
Friday, November 03, 2006
Take it to the Cross of Jesus
Met up with a long lost friend today, AS. It was a really good time of catching up and sharing. Remember those days early this year when I was still working in Shenton Way , we used to have lunch together every other day. This time round I saw her, my heart melted...she lost so much weight that at least to me her face seemed to sink in! Remnants of a really pretty face still remain..but what I saw was a face washed with tears, hurts, stress and hardship from the past 6 months since I last saw her.
Was pretty worried when she din contact me after I sms-ed her a birthday greeting. After we were seated comfortably did all the pouring come out. She was really broken and hurt inside. It's been years of accumulated hatred, hurt and unforgiveness that formed her from what she is today - a hardened heart.
She tried to put up a brave front still smiled and joked a lot in front of me, but the crunch time came when I asked her about her work...there torrents ran down her cheeks... AS could not take the pressure from work and hurts from her family that her sharing kept going back to the unfair treatment that she felt, the hurts that her family caused that she had began to question herself deeply, "Why am I working so hard for?" Stress and dejection really broke her when she realised that all in all she was really empty inside despite being in a high paying job and in high profile in the corporate world.
I assured her that she's really established as a career woman. "Rachel, you do not see what goes on inside, all the hurt and pain..." AS went on and on, so many times she cried over past hurts that her family has caused her, so many times she cried over the job that's wearing her down...
"AS, in our down times, do not let the devil have a foothold!" I keep praying for this friend, this deep cut inside that causing so much pain, the incident that fateful night one year ago at home that caused her to move out of her home, I pray that the Lord will hear her cry and heal her of her hurts. Questions came up on whether I hated my parents, which i told her in the past yes, I did, parents like humans are fallible, they did many unfair things and also hurt me, which I told CC the other day, the unspoken anguish that sometimes as firstborn that you have to carry... but its the forgiveness that brought me freedom, me finally putting down all the scores against my parents that once brought pain into joy... learnt a most wonderful quote today from Dr Lewis Smedes, in "Forgive and Forget"
"Revenge never evens the score, for alienated people never keep score of wrongs by the same mathematics. Forgiveness is the ONLY way to stop the cycle of unfair pain turning in your memory."
It's this same forgiveness that we must first have to see that we do will somehow fail another person, in whatever we do or in our speech, we need to acknowledge the fact that no matter how hard it seems to not to keep score, not to hold on to the right that you must be upset, or that the right to feel wronged.Freedom comes when we call onto the Lord!
My dear AS, you ARE in my prayers...
Was pretty worried when she din contact me after I sms-ed her a birthday greeting. After we were seated comfortably did all the pouring come out. She was really broken and hurt inside. It's been years of accumulated hatred, hurt and unforgiveness that formed her from what she is today - a hardened heart.
She tried to put up a brave front still smiled and joked a lot in front of me, but the crunch time came when I asked her about her work...there torrents ran down her cheeks... AS could not take the pressure from work and hurts from her family that her sharing kept going back to the unfair treatment that she felt, the hurts that her family caused that she had began to question herself deeply, "Why am I working so hard for?" Stress and dejection really broke her when she realised that all in all she was really empty inside despite being in a high paying job and in high profile in the corporate world.
I assured her that she's really established as a career woman. "Rachel, you do not see what goes on inside, all the hurt and pain..." AS went on and on, so many times she cried over past hurts that her family has caused her, so many times she cried over the job that's wearing her down...
"AS, in our down times, do not let the devil have a foothold!" I keep praying for this friend, this deep cut inside that causing so much pain, the incident that fateful night one year ago at home that caused her to move out of her home, I pray that the Lord will hear her cry and heal her of her hurts. Questions came up on whether I hated my parents, which i told her in the past yes, I did, parents like humans are fallible, they did many unfair things and also hurt me, which I told CC the other day, the unspoken anguish that sometimes as firstborn that you have to carry... but its the forgiveness that brought me freedom, me finally putting down all the scores against my parents that once brought pain into joy... learnt a most wonderful quote today from Dr Lewis Smedes, in "Forgive and Forget"
"Revenge never evens the score, for alienated people never keep score of wrongs by the same mathematics. Forgiveness is the ONLY way to stop the cycle of unfair pain turning in your memory."
It's this same forgiveness that we must first have to see that we do will somehow fail another person, in whatever we do or in our speech, we need to acknowledge the fact that no matter how hard it seems to not to keep score, not to hold on to the right that you must be upset, or that the right to feel wronged.Freedom comes when we call onto the Lord!
My dear AS, you ARE in my prayers...
Thursday, November 02, 2006
FINISHED 12 ASSIGNMENTS!
Yes, dear ladies and gentlemen, I have FINISHED my share of assignments for this semester. The moment when I slapped my IT Assignment CD on the table to my tutor during the timeslot today, I was ECSTATIC! No words can describe the feeling of huge relief that I felt.
All the Madness, late nights, all the discussions and word processing...wah...I have become an "assignment generator"!!
BUT WAIT....WAIT...assignments over...BUT my first English Paper is tomorrow! 2nd Nov...oppps!
*gasp* :P
All the Madness, late nights, all the discussions and word processing...wah...I have become an "assignment generator"!!
BUT WAIT....WAIT...assignments over...BUT my first English Paper is tomorrow! 2nd Nov...oppps!
*gasp* :P
Monday, October 30, 2006
Love-the driving force behind this run???
I underestimated the driving force of Love to me when I found myself,
Pushing the limits to run past my own stamina to hit the ends of East Coast Park yesterday to chase after a particular sickly sister, who ran alone, hitting way past 10km and having bad muscle aches now
I underestimated what Love can do to me, when I found myself,
Doing things that I would never imagine myself doing, like running like the wind in my flip flops (Sky Train not working la!:S) from Changi Terminal 2 to Terminal 1 after fetching a bro to send another bro off to his trip, to catch him before he leaves...
I underestimated the magnitude of Love that my parents had for me when
I saw that they always kept food for me even when I reach home late at night, and my dad will ALWAYS wait up for me, it really gives a warm fuzzy feeling all at once...
I underestimate the power of Love that can do to my soul when,
It propels me to pray, to worry, to shed tears, to simply think about the people I care for, to go to that person in need even when I am dead tired...
I underestimate what motivating force that Love has on me, when
I picked up playing the violin again after a span of 12 years at age 24, I made myself learn the guitar at age 23 all in a bid to learn to worship God better, to learn to adore God better,to learn to love God better...
I underestimate the sweetness of God's Love when,
In more ways than one, He has watched over me in my down times, He has blessed me with small rewards to let me know that He is still there, He healed me of my hurts and pain, He healed me of my sickness, He speaks to me and is the one I hold on to!
I underestimated the ultimate source of Love when,
I finally realised how much Christ loves us and died for our sins, the ugliness of my sins, my petty "crimes" that I have committed, the foul words that I have spoken, the evil thoughts that I have kept in my mind..WOW blows my mind everytime...I could only ask for His continuous Grace on me...
What has Love propelled you to do today? :)
Pushing the limits to run past my own stamina to hit the ends of East Coast Park yesterday to chase after a particular sickly sister, who ran alone, hitting way past 10km and having bad muscle aches now
I underestimated what Love can do to me, when I found myself,
Doing things that I would never imagine myself doing, like running like the wind in my flip flops (Sky Train not working la!:S) from Changi Terminal 2 to Terminal 1 after fetching a bro to send another bro off to his trip, to catch him before he leaves...
I underestimated the magnitude of Love that my parents had for me when
I saw that they always kept food for me even when I reach home late at night, and my dad will ALWAYS wait up for me, it really gives a warm fuzzy feeling all at once...
I underestimate the power of Love that can do to my soul when,
It propels me to pray, to worry, to shed tears, to simply think about the people I care for, to go to that person in need even when I am dead tired...
I underestimate what motivating force that Love has on me, when
I picked up playing the violin again after a span of 12 years at age 24, I made myself learn the guitar at age 23 all in a bid to learn to worship God better, to learn to adore God better,to learn to love God better...
I underestimate the sweetness of God's Love when,
In more ways than one, He has watched over me in my down times, He has blessed me with small rewards to let me know that He is still there, He healed me of my hurts and pain, He healed me of my sickness, He speaks to me and is the one I hold on to!
I underestimated the ultimate source of Love when,
I finally realised how much Christ loves us and died for our sins, the ugliness of my sins, my petty "crimes" that I have committed, the foul words that I have spoken, the evil thoughts that I have kept in my mind..WOW blows my mind everytime...I could only ask for His continuous Grace on me...
What has Love propelled you to do today? :)
Friday, October 27, 2006
NOSTALGIA TIME! 5 years mark in HOPE!
Five Years have past...I have rededicated my life to join a church, after having been a runaway sheep for years... It's been FIVE years with HOPE! *drum roll*
Been through 5 years of ministry in Hope, many laughter and of course tears...At the end of it all, you really appreciate those who have seen through with you all these years...Unearthed some really old pics of my fellow brothers and sisters (again!)...had a good laugh at some of them! So be nice to me or they would be slowly released to the world! (*evil laughter)...nah, I love God and His people too!
Do reminisce with me for those who have walked with me ...*pat on the back*!
Let's look forward to many more years to come eh?
Love you all!
Been through 5 years of ministry in Hope, many laughter and of course tears...At the end of it all, you really appreciate those who have seen through with you all these years...Unearthed some really old pics of my fellow brothers and sisters (again!)...had a good laugh at some of them! So be nice to me or they would be slowly released to the world! (*evil laughter)...nah, I love God and His people too!
Do reminisce with me for those who have walked with me ...*pat on the back*!
Let's look forward to many more years to come eh?
Love you all!
Monday, October 23, 2006
The Year of testing
Ever been through a year or so, months on end that you feel that you are being tested through and through? Everytime I was weighed down by the events that were happening to me, the gruelling of running the Christian race is never easy, I really want to cry. I want to cry real bad.
Poy mentioned that CG night, "Wah, being a Christian is not easy ah!" I told Jeannie also, "When heavy people fall, the impact on the fall on them is very big."
I meant literally of course, but when I thought back of the statements made..WOW something struck.
It's like months on end I seem to be going through things, struggling in between jobs, finances stretched, emotions tested through and through and stress from work and studies. Getting a bit inward looking I know, but all these are like burdens that weighed on your back, the wounds which cut your skin left scars and scratches. You still have remnants of it on your body after each saga.
I am getting "heavier" by all these, and I don't wanna fall. Really, its scary just to even think about it. The impact on yourself would be too great. Really need to daily release all these burdens to God! Of course there are tons of people worse off than me...but this is not a pity party....I ask myself,"How do I last the race?" Throwing in the towel is easy but its like being an escapist. A recent spate of events that happened to me can really make my hair turn grey. I was caught off guard, I wasn't prepared for this, Lord how do handle this? Stress levels hit an all time high, I was talking gibberish, my hands are shaking, I could not really think straight. What I thought I had overcome again, resurfaced in a totally new incident, GOd spoke to me, THAT is my stronghold.
Been reading Acts 24-26 about Paul being brought to trial before Felix, Fetus and the Caesar. He was tested, gruelling interrogations, at one point he could have got off the whole thing with a bribe but he chose to hang on. Two years plus of imprisonment and trial after trial...got me thinking, Will I succumb when tempted or deprived of something which is my stronghold? (hahah think I can hear a certain policeman's voice,"YOU MUST WEEN OFF COFFEE!")
Really tired, even as I write this, tears are welling in my eyes...Read this passage today and am greatly encouraged, made me wanna do something about the condition of my heart,
"In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith - of greater worth than gold, which perished even though refined by fire - may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honour when Jesus Christ is revealed.
Though you have not seen Him, you love Him and even though you do not see Him now, you believe in Him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls"
1 Peter 1:6-9
I am hanging on to the hope cos Jesus say so, I need to rejoice in what I am going through cos I know that at the end of it, I will receive the GOAL, God's divine and wonderful GOAL for me in my life. I am praying for myself to be rejoicing to be tested in this manner, cos these are the times that my faith is stretched even more, its like you step into something you are absolutely afraid of but you need to go through it with faith. Sometimes, you need to do it, not just for yourself, but for the people around you, for the people that really matters to you, for GOD!
Hang on Rac!
Poy mentioned that CG night, "Wah, being a Christian is not easy ah!" I told Jeannie also, "When heavy people fall, the impact on the fall on them is very big."
I meant literally of course, but when I thought back of the statements made..WOW something struck.
It's like months on end I seem to be going through things, struggling in between jobs, finances stretched, emotions tested through and through and stress from work and studies. Getting a bit inward looking I know, but all these are like burdens that weighed on your back, the wounds which cut your skin left scars and scratches. You still have remnants of it on your body after each saga.
I am getting "heavier" by all these, and I don't wanna fall. Really, its scary just to even think about it. The impact on yourself would be too great. Really need to daily release all these burdens to God! Of course there are tons of people worse off than me...but this is not a pity party....I ask myself,"How do I last the race?" Throwing in the towel is easy but its like being an escapist. A recent spate of events that happened to me can really make my hair turn grey. I was caught off guard, I wasn't prepared for this, Lord how do handle this? Stress levels hit an all time high, I was talking gibberish, my hands are shaking, I could not really think straight. What I thought I had overcome again, resurfaced in a totally new incident, GOd spoke to me, THAT is my stronghold.
Been reading Acts 24-26 about Paul being brought to trial before Felix, Fetus and the Caesar. He was tested, gruelling interrogations, at one point he could have got off the whole thing with a bribe but he chose to hang on. Two years plus of imprisonment and trial after trial...got me thinking, Will I succumb when tempted or deprived of something which is my stronghold? (hahah think I can hear a certain policeman's voice,"YOU MUST WEEN OFF COFFEE!")
Really tired, even as I write this, tears are welling in my eyes...Read this passage today and am greatly encouraged, made me wanna do something about the condition of my heart,
"In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith - of greater worth than gold, which perished even though refined by fire - may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honour when Jesus Christ is revealed.
Though you have not seen Him, you love Him and even though you do not see Him now, you believe in Him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls"
1 Peter 1:6-9
I am hanging on to the hope cos Jesus say so, I need to rejoice in what I am going through cos I know that at the end of it, I will receive the GOAL, God's divine and wonderful GOAL for me in my life. I am praying for myself to be rejoicing to be tested in this manner, cos these are the times that my faith is stretched even more, its like you step into something you are absolutely afraid of but you need to go through it with faith. Sometimes, you need to do it, not just for yourself, but for the people around you, for the people that really matters to you, for GOD!
Hang on Rac!
Monday, October 16, 2006
What I wanted to be when I grow up...
When I was growing up I had many dreams and aspirations.
Come to think of it, some of them are so farnie!!
I can remember during my Primary 1 or 2 days when the teacher would tell us to draw something that we wanted to be when we grow up..it was like the most asked question that my parents would coax me into answering day in and day out...
I remember the first time I drew a pic of my dream career, can you believe it I wanted to be a - POLICEMAN! I remember vividly striding into the Police Post one fine day with my Papa cos he wanted to report a minor accident with his car, think I was 6 or 7, I boldly told the PC in charge that, "Uncle, I want to be a POLICEMAN!" (I spot super short hair and my dad dressed me up like a boy) He bent down and talked to me like a adult to a child would and went,"You sure you want to be a Policeman? You dare to touch DEAD BODY?" not knowing what I was in for, I answered, "YES!"
Years later, i knew I would stray for this childhood ambition, after watching too much Crime Watch and saw all the horrible murders, and yes..seeing for myself TWO DBs! Blood splattered at the void deck from my block when some distressed ppl chose to commit suicide there..
Okay too much info, my next farnie ambition was to be a SIA girl! Always tell myself that I am tall enough and I shall apply to be a "Singapore girl" hee hee...cannot lor, me too "chor lor"...But was thinking, how nice it would be to fly all over the world and see places!
Then, I wanted to be an engineer, I struggled in my studies thru my engineer course, it was only until the final year did I finally found what I like about my studies, the Environmental Engineering part...:) Water treatment, Wastewater research, remembering the lab days when I ran samples after samples of "sh*t water". There was this prof in uni who inspired me a lot into this field, his name is Prof Appan. He made me so passionate about my research that I wanted to get a job into it after I grad, but sad to say, think the path that God has chosen for me was to be so different...
Remember a particular beer advertisement sometime back I think the guy in it goes,"My father was an engineer, and so was my father's father, But I am someone different..."
I can quote, "My father is an teacher and so is my mother, I am going to be one and so is my youngest sister!" Self fulfilling prophecy...:P These days, I am glad that the Lord has led me to where I am...:)
But there's this one HUGE dream since sec days till my early uni days on what I really wanted to be...I wanted to be a singer!! I love singing and love to add my own versions to any songs that I came across in the past. I would sing in the shower, I would sing on the way home, I would make up a song with any word that my friend's conversations end with, sometimes i write my own songs..I joined singing competitions in school, Hall Sing and strum group, Choir and really love KTV!!
Unearthed this next video of me and my sis Kerri when I was searching for a lost CD.. FIVE YEARS ago in Sep 2001 where she came to my hall to sing with me...I was not really part of HOPE yet, being a fringe member...wahaha...check out the geeky hairstyle and my shot at "stardom"!! Enjoy!
Come to think of it, some of them are so farnie!!
I can remember during my Primary 1 or 2 days when the teacher would tell us to draw something that we wanted to be when we grow up..it was like the most asked question that my parents would coax me into answering day in and day out...
I remember the first time I drew a pic of my dream career, can you believe it I wanted to be a - POLICEMAN! I remember vividly striding into the Police Post one fine day with my Papa cos he wanted to report a minor accident with his car, think I was 6 or 7, I boldly told the PC in charge that, "Uncle, I want to be a POLICEMAN!" (I spot super short hair and my dad dressed me up like a boy) He bent down and talked to me like a adult to a child would and went,"You sure you want to be a Policeman? You dare to touch DEAD BODY?" not knowing what I was in for, I answered, "YES!"
Years later, i knew I would stray for this childhood ambition, after watching too much Crime Watch and saw all the horrible murders, and yes..seeing for myself TWO DBs! Blood splattered at the void deck from my block when some distressed ppl chose to commit suicide there..
Okay too much info, my next farnie ambition was to be a SIA girl! Always tell myself that I am tall enough and I shall apply to be a "Singapore girl" hee hee...cannot lor, me too "chor lor"...But was thinking, how nice it would be to fly all over the world and see places!
Then, I wanted to be an engineer, I struggled in my studies thru my engineer course, it was only until the final year did I finally found what I like about my studies, the Environmental Engineering part...:) Water treatment, Wastewater research, remembering the lab days when I ran samples after samples of "sh*t water". There was this prof in uni who inspired me a lot into this field, his name is Prof Appan. He made me so passionate about my research that I wanted to get a job into it after I grad, but sad to say, think the path that God has chosen for me was to be so different...
Remember a particular beer advertisement sometime back I think the guy in it goes,"My father was an engineer, and so was my father's father, But I am someone different..."
I can quote, "My father is an teacher and so is my mother, I am going to be one and so is my youngest sister!" Self fulfilling prophecy...:P These days, I am glad that the Lord has led me to where I am...:)
But there's this one HUGE dream since sec days till my early uni days on what I really wanted to be...I wanted to be a singer!! I love singing and love to add my own versions to any songs that I came across in the past. I would sing in the shower, I would sing on the way home, I would make up a song with any word that my friend's conversations end with, sometimes i write my own songs..I joined singing competitions in school, Hall Sing and strum group, Choir and really love KTV!!
Unearthed this next video of me and my sis Kerri when I was searching for a lost CD.. FIVE YEARS ago in Sep 2001 where she came to my hall to sing with me...I was not really part of HOPE yet, being a fringe member...wahaha...check out the geeky hairstyle and my shot at "stardom"!! Enjoy!
Friday, October 13, 2006
Weird dreams...waking up to reality
Been encountering weird dreams earlier this week, distinctly heard a voice speaking into the picture and have seen clearly the face of a certain leader in the church...
Why this dream God? Has it manifested itself from what I have been constantly pondering in my mind to become in my dreams? Chinese say, "Ye4 chang2 mong4 duo1"
Woke up with a smile actually but at the same time feeling weird all over...
It's a very surreal feeling when sometimes what you dream come to pass and you have that "deja vu" feeling and you pray that its something that God wants to speak to you about. But that series of dreams...too abstract..something I dun quite understand... but I do know that the Lord is in charge of the situation. Somehow deep in my heart I hope and pray for that to happen...:P
The reality is not so easy, hardly so sweet as the dream but we have the LORD! :D
NIE is really tough, I witnessed colleagues breaking down under the stress, going "gila" in lectures, and simply talking gibberish when they try to talk to you. Some are mothers, others are fathers, breadwinners of the family, worrying over their child's PSLE and if someone has fallen sick of the family, anxiety and stress started to plaster all over the person's face. Recent spate of "throwing the letter of resignation" has occurred in the heat of assignments.
I wonder, studying in a high-strung environment, a distinctive college they call it, only to come out into another stress oven in the school environment. I question myself more and more, God to convict me, God to see me through this stress, Lord Jesus to help me bask in His love and glory to see me through. Hard questions everyday, do I really want to go through all these?
Then, I remembered my kids, my dear boys from that white-washed school in Bartley Rd, i remember every single face, every single friend that touched my heart in that school. Every prayer and every situation that I walked with the Lord in that little school. I was encouraged. I want to go back there. I miss them...
Dedicated to my little "dears"...
I'd know I'll Always ... by Rachel Tham
I'd know I'll always walk with a little skip in my gait
When I remember your smile upon me at the gate
I'd know I'll always dream of going back to the same place,
When I seem to retrace every incident back to where it began.
I'd know I'll always melt in my heart,
When I remember your voice, your face, your sweet sweet spirit,
I'd know I'll always ring in my ears,
With the sounds of your singing and jokes,
I'd know I'll always imagine being with you,
When I always look beside me to remember the times you walk with me,
I'd know I'll always pray for you,
Pray that each day with the Lord would be full of joy!
I'd know I'll always miss you, think of you, love you ALL.....
When my lips curl up when I talk about you,
I'd know I'll always cherish and wish you all the best
In all that you are ever going to do...
I'd know I'll always.....like you!
Why this dream God? Has it manifested itself from what I have been constantly pondering in my mind to become in my dreams? Chinese say, "Ye4 chang2 mong4 duo1"
Woke up with a smile actually but at the same time feeling weird all over...
It's a very surreal feeling when sometimes what you dream come to pass and you have that "deja vu" feeling and you pray that its something that God wants to speak to you about. But that series of dreams...too abstract..something I dun quite understand... but I do know that the Lord is in charge of the situation. Somehow deep in my heart I hope and pray for that to happen...:P
The reality is not so easy, hardly so sweet as the dream but we have the LORD! :D
NIE is really tough, I witnessed colleagues breaking down under the stress, going "gila" in lectures, and simply talking gibberish when they try to talk to you. Some are mothers, others are fathers, breadwinners of the family, worrying over their child's PSLE and if someone has fallen sick of the family, anxiety and stress started to plaster all over the person's face. Recent spate of "throwing the letter of resignation" has occurred in the heat of assignments.
I wonder, studying in a high-strung environment, a distinctive college they call it, only to come out into another stress oven in the school environment. I question myself more and more, God to convict me, God to see me through this stress, Lord Jesus to help me bask in His love and glory to see me through. Hard questions everyday, do I really want to go through all these?
Then, I remembered my kids, my dear boys from that white-washed school in Bartley Rd, i remember every single face, every single friend that touched my heart in that school. Every prayer and every situation that I walked with the Lord in that little school. I was encouraged. I want to go back there. I miss them...
Dedicated to my little "dears"...
I'd know I'll Always ... by Rachel Tham
I'd know I'll always walk with a little skip in my gait
When I remember your smile upon me at the gate
I'd know I'll always dream of going back to the same place,
When I seem to retrace every incident back to where it began.
I'd know I'll always melt in my heart,
When I remember your voice, your face, your sweet sweet spirit,
I'd know I'll always ring in my ears,
With the sounds of your singing and jokes,
I'd know I'll always imagine being with you,
When I always look beside me to remember the times you walk with me,
I'd know I'll always pray for you,
Pray that each day with the Lord would be full of joy!
I'd know I'll always miss you, think of you, love you ALL.....
When my lips curl up when I talk about you,
I'd know I'll always cherish and wish you all the best
In all that you are ever going to do...
I'd know I'll always.....like you!
Thursday, October 12, 2006
Friday, October 06, 2006
Woke up from a deep deep sleep...
Ever experienced this before, yourself working on an assignment or project continuously for a few days, not eating much or sleeping only at most 3 hours a day?
Then when you are finally done, you presented your stuff and you are like so so drained?
This is what just happened to me...I think the total number of hours I clocked this week on sleep is really less than 48 hours. So drained...I had my English presentation today, its one where each pair of teacher trainees will take over the tutor's role and give basically a lesson. We are to teach the class a particular topic. All research work and materials we are to collate ourselves and it takes up 20% of our curriculum
Me and my partner talked for a cool 2 hours, showing videos and giving our presentation. This is really not easy.. can imagine now how the Pastors talked on stage for so long... on one hand you have to engage your audience, another hand you have to explain and present your point across in a logical manner.
The moment my presentation ended at 230pm today...I don't know what happened after that.
I must have been living in a state of semi-conscious mind, i staggered to my last tutorial class of the day, slept through a good part of it, I remembered the previous day I had gone without food since morning working on the assignment..
I slept in my car pool.. and when i reached home I told my Auntie not to wake me up for dinner and fell into a deep deep sleep only to wake up at 12am to realise that the world has spun 5 and half hours. Not exactly feeling the sense of loss cos got more things coming up.
I had presented on teaching a particular text genre on expositions to children and on expanding the children's imagination by teaching them to write argumentative essays. Have attached the following video:
Some background, The teacher had told the kids to draw whatever comes to their mind. And this kid just kept on colouring everything black.A frightening scene for her.. Appalled the teacher sought the parent's help, psychiatrists' help...
The poor kid went into an asylum until the teacher discovered a trait of the kid...
Watch to the end...blew my mind on this one...in Japanese
Then when you are finally done, you presented your stuff and you are like so so drained?
This is what just happened to me...I think the total number of hours I clocked this week on sleep is really less than 48 hours. So drained...I had my English presentation today, its one where each pair of teacher trainees will take over the tutor's role and give basically a lesson. We are to teach the class a particular topic. All research work and materials we are to collate ourselves and it takes up 20% of our curriculum
Me and my partner talked for a cool 2 hours, showing videos and giving our presentation. This is really not easy.. can imagine now how the Pastors talked on stage for so long... on one hand you have to engage your audience, another hand you have to explain and present your point across in a logical manner.
The moment my presentation ended at 230pm today...I don't know what happened after that.
I must have been living in a state of semi-conscious mind, i staggered to my last tutorial class of the day, slept through a good part of it, I remembered the previous day I had gone without food since morning working on the assignment..
I slept in my car pool.. and when i reached home I told my Auntie not to wake me up for dinner and fell into a deep deep sleep only to wake up at 12am to realise that the world has spun 5 and half hours. Not exactly feeling the sense of loss cos got more things coming up.
I had presented on teaching a particular text genre on expositions to children and on expanding the children's imagination by teaching them to write argumentative essays. Have attached the following video:
Some background, The teacher had told the kids to draw whatever comes to their mind. And this kid just kept on colouring everything black.A frightening scene for her.. Appalled the teacher sought the parent's help, psychiatrists' help...
The poor kid went into an asylum until the teacher discovered a trait of the kid...
Watch to the end...blew my mind on this one...in Japanese
Wednesday, October 04, 2006
Something that I just learnt and re-learnt
2 Corinthians 5:20
"We are therefore Christ's ambassadors, as though God were making His appeal through us. We implore you on Christ's behalf: Be reconciled to God."
Just read a short but powerful and inspiring blog entry by Zhu Zhu and reaffirmed the perspective of God once again in my life.
What does it mean to be an ambassador for Christ? Means our lives, wholly representing Him and live out in His will through His grace and guidance.
How many times have God spoken to me and I have not taken Him at His Word? Saying, "Yes, Lord! Here I am, send me!" to simply to trust, to carry out and to just obey...
I let it slip too many times, Be reconciled to God, bridging this gap, drawing Him closer once again...
"We are therefore Christ's ambassadors, as though God were making His appeal through us. We implore you on Christ's behalf: Be reconciled to God."
Just read a short but powerful and inspiring blog entry by Zhu Zhu and reaffirmed the perspective of God once again in my life.
What does it mean to be an ambassador for Christ? Means our lives, wholly representing Him and live out in His will through His grace and guidance.
How many times have God spoken to me and I have not taken Him at His Word? Saying, "Yes, Lord! Here I am, send me!" to simply to trust, to carry out and to just obey...
I let it slip too many times, Be reconciled to God, bridging this gap, drawing Him closer once again...
Tuesday, October 03, 2006
Taking a break from Mad Rush of 12 assignments...
Yesh, this is crazy, i am sleep deprived, i have bad skin and yesh i look bad...
Study is tough and I am hanging on to God for dear life..
Today we had an rather interesting English class on rewriting sentences using better discriptive language. I am sure you all have seen it in the pri school English papers on joining two sentences together....
Well, some of the guys in the class managed to churn out really beautiful sentences, sure bet that they write really romantic love letter to their wives...:P
Okay, here are some sentences :
Question 1: The wind blew. John got cold.
Example: The icy wind blew strongly, making John feel like he was in a freezer.
Question 2: Carrie stood at the bus-stop. She was upset.
Rewriting 1: Carrie waited nervously at the bus-stop, sobbing quietly to herself.
Rachel's version: As she stood all alone at the bus-stop, the loneliness in Carrie's heart was not doing anything to stop tears from falling down her cheeks.
Question 3: The athlete ran. He won the race.
Rewriting 1: (This one takes the cake, by my classmate)The super-human athlete raced like lightning across the finishing line, breaking the ribbon in a flourish.
Question 4: She drank her coffee. She was thinking.
Rachel's version: Sipping her morning cuppa, she contemplated the day's events.
Question 5: Peter looked at the bully. He did not like him.
Rewriting 1: (another winner from the same guy) Peter stared swords and daggers at the very personification of evil at the corner, wishing the building will fall and crush him.
Rachel's version: Peter growled at the boy at the corner, the very presence of him made his hair stand on end.
Question 6: Wendy walked into the room. It was hot.
Rachel's version: Wendy walked into what seemed like a furnace of a room, with beads of perspiration plastered to the shirt on her back.
Now you try!
Question 7: Bruno was a dog. He barked at strangers.
Question 8: It rained all day. I thought it wouldn't stop.
Study is tough and I am hanging on to God for dear life..
Today we had an rather interesting English class on rewriting sentences using better discriptive language. I am sure you all have seen it in the pri school English papers on joining two sentences together....
Well, some of the guys in the class managed to churn out really beautiful sentences, sure bet that they write really romantic love letter to their wives...:P
Okay, here are some sentences :
Question 1: The wind blew. John got cold.
Example: The icy wind blew strongly, making John feel like he was in a freezer.
Question 2: Carrie stood at the bus-stop. She was upset.
Rewriting 1: Carrie waited nervously at the bus-stop, sobbing quietly to herself.
Rachel's version: As she stood all alone at the bus-stop, the loneliness in Carrie's heart was not doing anything to stop tears from falling down her cheeks.
Question 3: The athlete ran. He won the race.
Rewriting 1: (This one takes the cake, by my classmate)The super-human athlete raced like lightning across the finishing line, breaking the ribbon in a flourish.
Question 4: She drank her coffee. She was thinking.
Rachel's version: Sipping her morning cuppa, she contemplated the day's events.
Question 5: Peter looked at the bully. He did not like him.
Rewriting 1: (another winner from the same guy) Peter stared swords and daggers at the very personification of evil at the corner, wishing the building will fall and crush him.
Rachel's version: Peter growled at the boy at the corner, the very presence of him made his hair stand on end.
Question 6: Wendy walked into the room. It was hot.
Rachel's version: Wendy walked into what seemed like a furnace of a room, with beads of perspiration plastered to the shirt on her back.
Now you try!
Question 7: Bruno was a dog. He barked at strangers.
Question 8: It rained all day. I thought it wouldn't stop.
Saturday, September 30, 2006
My baby's hurting!
It's been close to 3 weeks that my baby sis has torn her ligament in her leg.
Swells, bruising, cast, crutches and all.
It's so traumatising for her in the midst of it all, where we all rushed to see her that morning and brought her to A & E of NUH.
"Torn ligament, with the ankle bone jutting out", declared the doctor.
I was so thankful that we din heed my dad's advice to immediately bring her to the Chinese sinseh, cos the moment me and my mum saw the foot, it's more than just a normal sprain...
Today, I helped her put the bandage onto her foot after my mum applied "Zheng4 Gu2 Shui3" after what was like the umpteenth time and it has a very pungent smell.
She winced.
Pain indescribable. My heart ached.
I bandaged for her and actually stole a prayer for her when my mum finally retreated to the room.
Tears rolled down her cheeks. Was it pain from the massaging of the foot or could there be a faintest hint that she was touched by the prayer?
It really hurts when someone you really love and care for break down in tears in front of you. I feel like crying with her.
God, only You know and You heal. Please restore her back to health, straighten her ankle and let her walk again. I pray for her that she would not go through the experience of operating on her foot and she would be able to do sports again. I hope and I pray that she would be close to Christ through this period of time. Help my baby, O Lord! Amen!
Swells, bruising, cast, crutches and all.
It's so traumatising for her in the midst of it all, where we all rushed to see her that morning and brought her to A & E of NUH.
"Torn ligament, with the ankle bone jutting out", declared the doctor.
I was so thankful that we din heed my dad's advice to immediately bring her to the Chinese sinseh, cos the moment me and my mum saw the foot, it's more than just a normal sprain...
Today, I helped her put the bandage onto her foot after my mum applied "Zheng4 Gu2 Shui3" after what was like the umpteenth time and it has a very pungent smell.
She winced.
Pain indescribable. My heart ached.
I bandaged for her and actually stole a prayer for her when my mum finally retreated to the room.
Tears rolled down her cheeks. Was it pain from the massaging of the foot or could there be a faintest hint that she was touched by the prayer?
It really hurts when someone you really love and care for break down in tears in front of you. I feel like crying with her.
God, only You know and You heal. Please restore her back to health, straighten her ankle and let her walk again. I pray for her that she would not go through the experience of operating on her foot and she would be able to do sports again. I hope and I pray that she would be close to Christ through this period of time. Help my baby, O Lord! Amen!
Tuesday, September 26, 2006
Cry Out To Jesus by THIRD DAY
This is a rather poignant video...am touched by the lyrics and also the song.
One of popular contemporary Christian Rock Bands ...:P
Cry Out To Jesus - Third Day (2005)
To everyone who's lost someone they love
long before it was their time.
You feel like the days you had were not enough
when you said goodbye.
And to all of the people with burdens and pains
keepin' you back from your life.
You believe that there's nothing
and there is no one who can make it right.
Chorus:
There is hope for the helpless, rest for the weary,
and love for the broken hearts.
There is grace and forgiveness, mercy and healing
He'll meet you wherever you are.
Cry out to Jesus. Cry out to Jesus.
For the marriage that's struggling just to hang on
They lost all of their faith in love.
and they've done all they can to make it right again
still it's not enough.
For the ones who can't break the addictions and chains
you try to give up but you come back again.
Just remember that you're not alone
in your shame and your suffering.
There is hope for the helpless, rest for the weary,
and love for the broken hearts.
There is grace and forgiveness, mercy and healing
He'll meet you wherever you are.
Cry out to Jesus.
When you're lonely and it feels like the whole world is falling on you
you just reach out, you just cry out to Jesus
Cry to Jesus.
To the widow who suffers from being alone,
wipin' the tears from her eyes.
For the children around the world without a home,
say a prayer tonight.
Chorus (Repeat 2 times)
Cry out to Jesus. Cry out to Jesus.
Cry out to Jesus. Cry out to Jesus.
One of popular contemporary Christian Rock Bands ...:P
Cry Out To Jesus - Third Day (2005)
To everyone who's lost someone they love
long before it was their time.
You feel like the days you had were not enough
when you said goodbye.
And to all of the people with burdens and pains
keepin' you back from your life.
You believe that there's nothing
and there is no one who can make it right.
Chorus:
There is hope for the helpless, rest for the weary,
and love for the broken hearts.
There is grace and forgiveness, mercy and healing
He'll meet you wherever you are.
Cry out to Jesus. Cry out to Jesus.
For the marriage that's struggling just to hang on
They lost all of their faith in love.
and they've done all they can to make it right again
still it's not enough.
For the ones who can't break the addictions and chains
you try to give up but you come back again.
Just remember that you're not alone
in your shame and your suffering.
There is hope for the helpless, rest for the weary,
and love for the broken hearts.
There is grace and forgiveness, mercy and healing
He'll meet you wherever you are.
Cry out to Jesus.
When you're lonely and it feels like the whole world is falling on you
you just reach out, you just cry out to Jesus
Cry to Jesus.
To the widow who suffers from being alone,
wipin' the tears from her eyes.
For the children around the world without a home,
say a prayer tonight.
Chorus (Repeat 2 times)
Cry out to Jesus. Cry out to Jesus.
Cry out to Jesus. Cry out to Jesus.
Monday, September 25, 2006
2 Milestones in Life
This week is a week of milestones for me..
Milestone 1: I completed running 5km much faster now.
On Saturday, I actually woke up at 545am to run! Inspired by the enthusiasm of my sheep, she was very very keen to practise running the Stan Chart Run really early in the morning! Poy and Ah Cheng both had something on at 11am so Zhu Zhu came up with the idea of running at 7am at the River Valley Ministry House!
I was so surprised myself that I can drag myself up. Previous night, I had returned home late after watching Forbidden City with Irene..It's superb, shall blog about it another time.
Woke up and dragged myself to River Valley having reached Sengkang Station at 630am. After a short warm up and stretching we were off, cutting through Chatsworth Road, through to past all the Embassies and Gleneagles Hospital and then Botanic Gardens!
The morning air was so fresh, really could feel my whole body more at ease when I ran in the morning then evening. Not albeit muscle and knee pains after that...:(
Botanical Gardens was refreshing, some crowds of people are already there, walking their dogs, and practising Tai Chi and swordplay...;P there was even a Chinese Christian Choir doing warm-ups with their voices...
Phew am so tired after the run that I plonked down and napped on the couch in the Ministry House..:P
Milestone 2: Passed my Violin Grade 6 Exam with a Merit!
I cannot believe it! It's really God's grace again! Throughout the 11 months preparation, I was even more broke than last time, spent much more money in fact about 3.5K in total! God showed me in more ways than one, His love manifested through many people:
First, I managed to get Geo to help me with the Aural preparation, to teach me how to sing and manage all the "tau geh" on sight.
I have to thank my dear friend Nizam!! He managed to grabbed hold of secret lock codes for me to enter into free sound proof studios complete with an upright Yamaha piano in each of them! It's exhorbitant to rent studios and they were charged at 40 per hour. I nearly cried when i heard the pricing...
My dearest pianist Salome reduced her hiring fees for me so that I could save on all the expenses, and even kindly provided for me her church premises, her house for me to practice on the violin...:P
God is so gracious! She had went on a conference in Taiwan and had come back earlier especially for me! Can you imagine how touched I was? Was super touched...Despite the break in training... My boo boo in the actual exam, I trembled even much more than I did last year and could not even play my scales properly!! I remembered vividly that I even turned off the air con cos it was blowing my music sheets all over the place....EVERY SINGLE MISTAKE COULD BE HEARD CLEARLY :P
I think I pity the British examiner, in a hot and stuffy room without aircon, in long sleeves and tie, okay what's worse? i) Being STUCK with me. What's worst for him? ii) Being stuck with my awful violin playing. What's really torturing him at that time? iii) I was the last candidate in that time slot that ate into his precious lunch time...:P Phewwweeee!
I thank God for being with me every step of the way...I shall press on to complete my training!
I would also like to thank every single one of my friends, bros and sis who prayed for me and with me for this exam! You all make a difference! :D
Milestone 1: I completed running 5km much faster now.
On Saturday, I actually woke up at 545am to run! Inspired by the enthusiasm of my sheep, she was very very keen to practise running the Stan Chart Run really early in the morning! Poy and Ah Cheng both had something on at 11am so Zhu Zhu came up with the idea of running at 7am at the River Valley Ministry House!
I was so surprised myself that I can drag myself up. Previous night, I had returned home late after watching Forbidden City with Irene..It's superb, shall blog about it another time.
Woke up and dragged myself to River Valley having reached Sengkang Station at 630am. After a short warm up and stretching we were off, cutting through Chatsworth Road, through to past all the Embassies and Gleneagles Hospital and then Botanic Gardens!
The morning air was so fresh, really could feel my whole body more at ease when I ran in the morning then evening. Not albeit muscle and knee pains after that...:(
Botanical Gardens was refreshing, some crowds of people are already there, walking their dogs, and practising Tai Chi and swordplay...;P there was even a Chinese Christian Choir doing warm-ups with their voices...
Phew am so tired after the run that I plonked down and napped on the couch in the Ministry House..:P
Milestone 2: Passed my Violin Grade 6 Exam with a Merit!
I cannot believe it! It's really God's grace again! Throughout the 11 months preparation, I was even more broke than last time, spent much more money in fact about 3.5K in total! God showed me in more ways than one, His love manifested through many people:
First, I managed to get Geo to help me with the Aural preparation, to teach me how to sing and manage all the "tau geh" on sight.
I have to thank my dear friend Nizam!! He managed to grabbed hold of secret lock codes for me to enter into free sound proof studios complete with an upright Yamaha piano in each of them! It's exhorbitant to rent studios and they were charged at 40 per hour. I nearly cried when i heard the pricing...
My dearest pianist Salome reduced her hiring fees for me so that I could save on all the expenses, and even kindly provided for me her church premises, her house for me to practice on the violin...:P
God is so gracious! She had went on a conference in Taiwan and had come back earlier especially for me! Can you imagine how touched I was? Was super touched...Despite the break in training... My boo boo in the actual exam, I trembled even much more than I did last year and could not even play my scales properly!! I remembered vividly that I even turned off the air con cos it was blowing my music sheets all over the place....EVERY SINGLE MISTAKE COULD BE HEARD CLEARLY :P
I think I pity the British examiner, in a hot and stuffy room without aircon, in long sleeves and tie, okay what's worse? i) Being STUCK with me. What's worst for him? ii) Being stuck with my awful violin playing. What's really torturing him at that time? iii) I was the last candidate in that time slot that ate into his precious lunch time...:P Phewwweeee!
I thank God for being with me every step of the way...I shall press on to complete my training!
I would also like to thank every single one of my friends, bros and sis who prayed for me and with me for this exam! You all make a difference! :D
Saturday, September 23, 2006
Hope Church 15th Anniversary! 16th Sep 2006
Me and Mingzhu
The elusive misty machine that caused us to splutter and cough whenever it puts out smoke, totally engulfing us in smoke and blurring our vision, hahah Simon our E-guitarist stepped on the wrong pedal!! attempt to make us look mysterious
I know this post comes late but I really thank God for being part of the Anniversary Band this year! I remember the times when I really had to drag myself in between the rehearsals, the preparation for the violin exam, the workload in NIE ..I thank GOD that He brought me through. The long hours spent was certainly worth it!The one word to really describe the experience is, "BEAUTIFUL!" The presence of the Lord could be clearly felt throughout the hall as people were soaked in worshipping and praising God. The perspective I saw from when I was stationed on the stage was simply breathtaking! The balloons, the confetti, yes and all of you!!
Despite the previous day's rehearsals ending at 11:30pm and musios having to come early to do sound checks and rehearsals at 830am, the moment we went on stage and the song "Highest" came, sweet adoration just overflowed from my heart, all my tiredness, fatigue seemed to melt away and really dwell in the presence of the LORD!
We shared many jokes also, about the infamous "dry-ice machine" who would emit smoke every few minutes without warning, shrouding us in choking smoke, making us cough and wheeze always...a lot of near accidents happened! waahhaa.. Sijia noted during lunch that both our hands were trembling badly that we could not hold the spoonful of rice properly...we really played so much! :P we had only 45 minutes then to finish our lunch, change, do hair and makeup..You all should have seen the dressing and makeup room, it was WARFARE!! Shen Teng looked so "pretty" with gelled hair and blusher! :P
I would say this again, nothing beats playing together in a band who flows together and who really all have a heart burden to see people being drawn by the music to worship unto the LORD. I made many friends and certainly gained more experience in playing techniques and missing the times now that I think of it...:P I am so impressed with the youth singers and musios! Simon, the shredder E-guitarist is 17! Joanne, one of the lead worshippers is like only 23? Check out her voice here from this video clip from Junming's blog:
Think now, the song that is stuck in my head is the song written by our very own musio, David "Ah Seng" Chua who wrote "Greater"
"You must be Greater in me O Lord,
Let all the rest fade away
Draw me nearer to You each day
I yearn to fix my eyes on You.
I want to give You my everything
Just to walk with You by my side
My joy is complete in You
For You are my strength, my hope"
May the Lord always be my strength and my hope,
Be my Love, ........Always....:)
Tuesday, September 19, 2006
Personality Tests taken on a stressed up day! :P
| You Are 70% Extrovert, 30% Introvert |
 You are quite outgoing You are a social connector - you know a ton of people While you aren't a wild extrovert, you are a great talker A fantastic storyteller, you keep everyone laughing |
| You Are Sunrise |
 You enjoy living a slow, fulfilling life. You enjoy living every moment, no matter how ordinary. You are a person of reflection and meditation. You start and end every day by looking inward. Caring and giving, you enjoy making people happy. You're often cooking for friends or buying them gifts. All in all, you know how to love life for what it is - not for how it should be. |
You Are A Realistic Romantic |
You are more romantic than 70% of the population.  It's easy for you to get swept away by romance... But you've done a pretty good job keeping perspective. You're still taken in by love poems and sunsets You just don't fall for every dreamy pick up line! |
Sunday, September 17, 2006
Birthed into a new CG!
As of two weeks ago our CG birthed into another one I am now under the new group called NG6B3 under Poy...
I am a bit sad that we have to split after only one year by God's grace and missing also the lovable characters when we were under one big group..but I am excited about the opportunities that lay ahead for each and everyone of us.
There are certainly more chances to serve now that our group is so much smaller...left only me and Zhu zhu 2 gals lei...must bring in more gals...so poor thing the both of us faced with 5 very noisy guys!!
Was very encouraged when I heard Zhu zhu mentioned about Joe and Yicheng and Law leading praise and worship together and the joke on the song chosen by Joe "Cheww-yee-Chew-yeee, ooom bah bah!" Okay its "Therefore being Justified by Faith"
You see? smaller group means that each one of us do not depend on the others to work or to serve but it comes outta of our own comfort zone to pick ourselves up, bravely tell your CL..i wanna serve.
I wanna serve.
There are still so many areas that I can contribute to the group. Am excited on how its going to come out...I pray that I would be able to avail myself more to see our group mature and grow in numbers!
Shall start with a guitar lesson to teach my sheep...any more takers?
I propose Wednesdays and Tuesdays... if i dun have music prac hee..:)
I am a bit sad that we have to split after only one year by God's grace and missing also the lovable characters when we were under one big group..but I am excited about the opportunities that lay ahead for each and everyone of us.
There are certainly more chances to serve now that our group is so much smaller...left only me and Zhu zhu 2 gals lei...must bring in more gals...so poor thing the both of us faced with 5 very noisy guys!!
Was very encouraged when I heard Zhu zhu mentioned about Joe and Yicheng and Law leading praise and worship together and the joke on the song chosen by Joe "Cheww-yee-Chew-yeee, ooom bah bah!" Okay its "Therefore being Justified by Faith"
You see? smaller group means that each one of us do not depend on the others to work or to serve but it comes outta of our own comfort zone to pick ourselves up, bravely tell your CL..i wanna serve.
I wanna serve.
There are still so many areas that I can contribute to the group. Am excited on how its going to come out...I pray that I would be able to avail myself more to see our group mature and grow in numbers!
Shall start with a guitar lesson to teach my sheep...any more takers?
I propose Wednesdays and Tuesdays... if i dun have music prac hee..:)
Friday, September 08, 2006
Teacher's Day at NIE!
This year's Teacher's Day is spent on Friday at NIE itself. We had a Maths Lab Lesson and one of my classmates actually bought a cake to share to the whole class. Something special is that we are teachers celebrating for our teacher! Absolutely felt like a small kid again, we sang Happy Teacher's Day in the tune of Happy Birthday to our Maths Tutor, Mr Lee Ngan Hoe. He's a really funny guy and we all really love him.. CC see if you can spot your friend Kevin in the pic? :P
Made Mr Lee turn around to face us as we sing the song!
My QCM 501 class! :D
Made Mr Lee turn around to face us as we sing the song!
My QCM 501 class! :D
ONE dollar-one-dollar-one-dollar-ONE!!!
Yes, can you believe it? My dad was so mean that he actually made a huge joke outta me signing up for the Stan Chart run. Over an episode of "My lovely Samsoon" on TV, he could not stop laughing when I told him that I have plucked up the courage to sign up for a 10km run...
He immediately turned over to Ma and said,"I'll bet you ONE DOLLAR that she would NOT be able to run on Wednesday!" (After an enthu Rac rushed to declare to them that she's going to run come Wednesday after school!)
Indignant and possibly sheepish with my laughing parents, I made a stubborn decision in my mind to run no matter what. Come Wednesday, I finally finished my 3 Maths quizzes mini "Marathon" and my head is swimming from the lack of sleep and yes when you all see me this week, I have outbreaks all over! :P Maths is so tough!
It's such a drag that when I reached home yesterday at 630pm I had to pluck myself from the couch to start running. Put on my shoes and all of a sudden became super conscious. Made a huge mistake of not warming up and immediately started running round the neighbourhood...
This is the first time I ran round my estate can? Have moved in Sengkang for a good 7 years and i am still a stranger to my neighbourhood! That really tells me how long I have not walked around my house..Highly strung, I found it very hard to relax and enjoy the run, my mind still clogged with lotsa things...Wow the force of gravity has certainly worked even betta since the last time I ran, every step seemed so tough and heavy.:P
Okay managed a tiny little distance of 4 rounds around the estate. Estimated 2km?? wahahah and Joe said,"It's 1/5 of your total distance! Jia you!!"
Still recovering from aching limbs, am lousy right?
He immediately turned over to Ma and said,"I'll bet you ONE DOLLAR that she would NOT be able to run on Wednesday!" (After an enthu Rac rushed to declare to them that she's going to run come Wednesday after school!)
Indignant and possibly sheepish with my laughing parents, I made a stubborn decision in my mind to run no matter what. Come Wednesday, I finally finished my 3 Maths quizzes mini "Marathon" and my head is swimming from the lack of sleep and yes when you all see me this week, I have outbreaks all over! :P Maths is so tough!
It's such a drag that when I reached home yesterday at 630pm I had to pluck myself from the couch to start running. Put on my shoes and all of a sudden became super conscious. Made a huge mistake of not warming up and immediately started running round the neighbourhood...
This is the first time I ran round my estate can? Have moved in Sengkang for a good 7 years and i am still a stranger to my neighbourhood! That really tells me how long I have not walked around my house..Highly strung, I found it very hard to relax and enjoy the run, my mind still clogged with lotsa things...Wow the force of gravity has certainly worked even betta since the last time I ran, every step seemed so tough and heavy.:P
Okay managed a tiny little distance of 4 rounds around the estate. Estimated 2km?? wahahah and Joe said,"It's 1/5 of your total distance! Jia you!!"
Still recovering from aching limbs, am lousy right?
Sunday, September 03, 2006
Treading on dangerous ground...
Ever hear this line that's mentioned in movies? Expecially those swashbuckling movies where swords are welded, flashes from the clash of swords later and the two lead characters suddenly goes,
"Mister, you are treading on dangerous ground!"
This is what exactly I am feeling for the past few days. It's not about lack of faith, but I really tend to think I am living life on the edge from the things that I have been doing:
1)I signed up for Stan Chart 10km run!!
Yes, to those runners out there.. Miss Tham here has not run in a good number of years and the pounds are packing onto pretty obvious places. I dunno what went into my mind when I took the challenge and signed up for the run with my sheep Zhu Zhu.
Guess I was really motivated by all the CG members and CC mind you, signing up for the FULL MARATHON!They all did so well at the recent Army Half Marathon. wah..scary sia...in a matter of 13 weeks I have to run 10km? Time to get out of that couch and work out!! Good luck to my legs man...:P
2)There are 3 quizzes next week and 3 assignments due by the end of the month.
You guessed it. I really struggle to study for them and do the assignments. Last Friday, after the lecturer threw us a bomb of 3 more assignments. What went into my mind was "And a Happy Teacher's Day to you too!" wahahah satirical joke but I think I am getting really stressed out.So the current count for assignments are,
Maths, 3 written ones including a pedagogical presentation and a lesson plan, plus a research one to be done on educational websites for children.
English, one major presentaion involving a research into a certain genre of children's books and to teach the whole class on the topic.
Educational Psychology: 1 group assignment and 1 Individual assignment
ICT (computing for teaching): 1 1000-word assignment.
Total Assignment count => 7
3)I am surviving on cents that make up to dollars.
The violin exam is finally over, but I am living on what little my savings can allow me. Had spent a bomb on the preparation for this exam. It is much much more than last year as I am sitting for a higher grade now. Bills and loans have been very punctual in their arrivals. Am praying very hard for Pay Day! How far would you go for your dreams and aspirations? For me, its really all the way...:P
4)My health is suffering
There's something awfully wrong with my system somehow. I am getting more anxious, heartbeats are faster (Not particularly when I'm in close proximity to anyone special:p). My hands are trembing...the other day I was just holding on to a spoon to drink soup when I realised how much of the soup I am spilling... My hands are trembling so so much!!Outbreaks on the face are happening. Tempers are slightly shorter. Must be stress, definitely.
Lord Jesus, help me when I am so weak, when all things seem so hard to handle and when everything seems hopeless. Lord I claim Hebrews 6:19 when I cling on to the hope that it is an ANCHOR to my soul, firm and secure. I rest my security in You and nothing can ever take it away from me. Lord, may Your grace continue to cover me and I seek Your forgiveness when I lacked the trust in You and still chose to sway from Your path. Guide me, Lead me and heal me, I submit my life in Your hands! Amen!
"Mister, you are treading on dangerous ground!"
This is what exactly I am feeling for the past few days. It's not about lack of faith, but I really tend to think I am living life on the edge from the things that I have been doing:
1)I signed up for Stan Chart 10km run!!
Yes, to those runners out there.. Miss Tham here has not run in a good number of years and the pounds are packing onto pretty obvious places. I dunno what went into my mind when I took the challenge and signed up for the run with my sheep Zhu Zhu.
Guess I was really motivated by all the CG members and CC mind you, signing up for the FULL MARATHON!They all did so well at the recent Army Half Marathon. wah..scary sia...in a matter of 13 weeks I have to run 10km? Time to get out of that couch and work out!! Good luck to my legs man...:P
2)There are 3 quizzes next week and 3 assignments due by the end of the month.
You guessed it. I really struggle to study for them and do the assignments. Last Friday, after the lecturer threw us a bomb of 3 more assignments. What went into my mind was "And a Happy Teacher's Day to you too!" wahahah satirical joke but I think I am getting really stressed out.So the current count for assignments are,
Maths, 3 written ones including a pedagogical presentation and a lesson plan, plus a research one to be done on educational websites for children.
English, one major presentaion involving a research into a certain genre of children's books and to teach the whole class on the topic.
Educational Psychology: 1 group assignment and 1 Individual assignment
ICT (computing for teaching): 1 1000-word assignment.
Total Assignment count => 7
3)I am surviving on cents that make up to dollars.
The violin exam is finally over, but I am living on what little my savings can allow me. Had spent a bomb on the preparation for this exam. It is much much more than last year as I am sitting for a higher grade now. Bills and loans have been very punctual in their arrivals. Am praying very hard for Pay Day! How far would you go for your dreams and aspirations? For me, its really all the way...:P
4)My health is suffering
There's something awfully wrong with my system somehow. I am getting more anxious, heartbeats are faster (Not particularly when I'm in close proximity to anyone special:p). My hands are trembing...the other day I was just holding on to a spoon to drink soup when I realised how much of the soup I am spilling... My hands are trembling so so much!!Outbreaks on the face are happening. Tempers are slightly shorter. Must be stress, definitely.
Lord Jesus, help me when I am so weak, when all things seem so hard to handle and when everything seems hopeless. Lord I claim Hebrews 6:19 when I cling on to the hope that it is an ANCHOR to my soul, firm and secure. I rest my security in You and nothing can ever take it away from me. Lord, may Your grace continue to cover me and I seek Your forgiveness when I lacked the trust in You and still chose to sway from Your path. Guide me, Lead me and heal me, I submit my life in Your hands! Amen!
Friday, August 25, 2006
What happened on 9th August? a chronological rundown from midnight 00 00 hrs...:P
I know this comes in a bit late..but I really wanna thank all the well wishes of the people who sent me their sms and all their treats....Had actually kept all these sms-es in my phone...could not bear to delete them heee heee..aLSO to the Lord Almighty for creating me back in my mother's womb that I can see this beautiful world and all my friends...
At the stroke of midnight: Issac ("ah-chek", IZ)
12:10 am Caizhu:"Dear sis, Shen yat fa lok! May e Lord shine on u an thru u. B Blez. Cya."
Poy: "Happy blessed bday! Claim your present from Him, He has already given you His promises!"
12:11am Angela:"Yo racheal, Happy Bdae to u! May you be blessed w love, joy n peace in the days ahead...Hope u'll experience greater breakthru in your music, carrier n r/s...stay joyful always :)
12:14am
Shen Teng:"Happy birthday! :) Thanks for guiding me to play violin in wam. I am sure God will use u even more in the area of music as u avail yourself to serve more :)"
12:18am
Shi Ming:"Hi happy bithday! Today is the start of a brand new year for you!"
12:34am
Lawrence ("Gao de"):"I knock on Heaven door. God asks "Wat can I do 4 u?" I ask "Pls Love, Protect & Bless the One reading this sms" 1 yr older ya!"
12:35am
Lyndi:"God bless u on tis lovely day & as God fulfil His promise 4 ur life. I pray He'll snuggle u deep in His love and grace . :)"
12:46am
Yexiang:" Happy birthday Rac! :)"
1:16am
From a sweet young bro, Joe:"I thk our Father in heaven 4 such a bubbly sis in u. ur lively joyful character brings much life n excitm 2 our lives. certainly irreplacable :) it has been a blessg 2b able to embark on tis walk wu. HAPPY BIRTHDAY RAC!!lets look 4ward 2 great things n experiences tt He has prepared 4us :Dhv a blessed dy in Him"
1:40am
Another sweet young bro, Jason: "Happy national day, I mean happy birthday to you."
4:38am
Our youngest brother in Christ ,Qiuping: "Happy Birthday Sis! Today, a beginning of a new day to rejoice in e LORD! Life in Christ may not be easy but remain perseverance, continually focus onto Him and His purpose in u. For He knows ur heart desire wholly & surely bless u wif more than u can imagine. Enjoy ur day wif Him! Amen!"
4:51am (These people dun sleep eh? wahahaha...)
Wilson:"Happy Bday! May e LORD our GREAT GOD bless u n may all ur wishes come true! Haf a blessed moment. :)"
8:45am
Spencer:"Hey happy b dae,man."
10:09am
Jiawei:"Hey happy birthday to u! Have a nice day today!"
10:29am
Jingjie (NJC friend):"Happy birthday!"
**Rac then takes a break to enjoy my first treat of the day, from two lovely sisters, Sarah and Jeannie who blessed me with a Hillsong songbook and a breakfast treat at Cafe Cartel, dear me blur la, went to the WRONG PLACE! had arrived at CITY Hall instead of PLAZA SING! Can imagine their exasperation! Thanks dear sweeties for putting up with my nonsense! So glad! Jammin'time!**
11:17am
Yuemei(my dear pri sch friend):"hapy birthday! cheers!"
12:48pm
Ah Zhen Ah yee:" :D Hai4 pi2 BIRTHDAY!"
**Rac takes another break to bring family to eat the Holland V XO bee hoon! Slurp Slurp! so full yeah?**
13 14h
Rachel Tan:"Enjoy the day as the nation celebrates with you! happy birtday!!"
13 37h
Rachael Lee:"Happy & Blessed Birthday!May u enjoy another yr of God's blessings! Luv, Rach"
13 45h
Zhiyong:"Happy national day and happy birthday! - Zhiyong :)"
13 47h
John (CJC - Lao ge):"Hey happy birthday 2 u xiaomei! May the Lord bless u and take care. Enjoy urself ya. =)"
14 11h
Karen:"Happy birthday sis! May u be blessed with much more in life! How's celebration gonna be like for u? Enjoy ur special day!"
14 41h
Kim: "Happy Birthday"
15 24h
Jiajun:"Hey babe! Blessed birthday! May e Lord bless this day n year to come.:)"
16 07h
Fenny:"HAPPY BIRTHDAY :)"
16 25h
Ziwei (NTU CEE Buddy):"Hi Rachel. Happy birthday to you! :D"
16 38h
Mingyang:"Happy birthday!"
17 15h
Guang An:" Happy birthday sis. Hope you like the songbook."
**Rac now stuffed to the brim (this is so not doing any good to my thick waistline), rushed down to ah Cheng's place at River Valley for CG...Received a hippo from Mingzhu!**
17 52h
Nizam (NTU CEE Buddy):"my apologies if i'm late, but here's wishing you happy birthday and happy national day!may you have a wonderful year ahead! :)"
**Rac now rushed down to prolly the finaly gathering for the day, of all my old NJC classmates at Serangoon, Wenli's place...**
20 15h
Guang Rong (UL):"As we celebrate National Day, may u also hav a wonderful, memorable and blessed birthday.:)"
21 42h
Pamela:"Happy Birthday once again gal!"
22 06h
Cheng Jie:"before the day is over...happy birthday rachel! hope ya had a memorable 27th hatchday! take care n god bless, as always! ;)"
22 23h
Chukai:"Happy birthday rachel! happy 41st..opps I mean 27th birthday. The Lord bless the year ahead and may he add to you even greater opportunities ahead."
22 30h
Limin:"Hey babe, happy bdae! Stay pretty & cool k."
22 50h
Florence Neo:"Happy birthday Rachel. Just in timeo to wish you.:) May you remain beautiful for God. May your dreams come true. Be strong and courageous for God always - flo"
10/08/06
0900h
Aunt Jo:" Happy belated birthday!"
My apologies to anyone if I have missed out their names in any way..shall blog about my birthday wishes another time!
At the stroke of midnight: Issac ("ah-chek", IZ)
12:10 am Caizhu:"Dear sis, Shen yat fa lok! May e Lord shine on u an thru u. B Blez. Cya."
Poy: "Happy blessed bday! Claim your present from Him, He has already given you His promises!"
12:11am Angela:"Yo racheal, Happy Bdae to u! May you be blessed w love, joy n peace in the days ahead...Hope u'll experience greater breakthru in your music, carrier n r/s...stay joyful always :)
12:14am
Shen Teng:"Happy birthday! :) Thanks for guiding me to play violin in wam. I am sure God will use u even more in the area of music as u avail yourself to serve more :)"
12:18am
Shi Ming:"Hi happy bithday! Today is the start of a brand new year for you!"
12:34am
Lawrence ("Gao de"):"I knock on Heaven door. God asks "Wat can I do 4 u?" I ask "Pls Love, Protect & Bless the One reading this sms" 1 yr older ya!"
12:35am
Lyndi:"God bless u on tis lovely day & as God fulfil His promise 4 ur life. I pray He'll snuggle u deep in His love and grace . :)"
12:46am
Yexiang:" Happy birthday Rac! :)"
1:16am
From a sweet young bro, Joe:"I thk our Father in heaven 4 such a bubbly sis in u. ur lively joyful character brings much life n excitm 2 our lives. certainly irreplacable :) it has been a blessg 2b able to embark on tis walk wu. HAPPY BIRTHDAY RAC!!lets look 4ward 2 great things n experiences tt He has prepared 4us :Dhv a blessed dy in Him"
1:40am
Another sweet young bro, Jason: "Happy national day, I mean happy birthday to you."
4:38am
Our youngest brother in Christ ,Qiuping: "Happy Birthday Sis! Today, a beginning of a new day to rejoice in e LORD! Life in Christ may not be easy but remain perseverance, continually focus onto Him and His purpose in u. For He knows ur heart desire wholly & surely bless u wif more than u can imagine. Enjoy ur day wif Him! Amen!"
4:51am (These people dun sleep eh? wahahaha...)
Wilson:"Happy Bday! May e LORD our GREAT GOD bless u n may all ur wishes come true! Haf a blessed moment. :)"
8:45am
Spencer:"Hey happy b dae,man."
10:09am
Jiawei:"Hey happy birthday to u! Have a nice day today!"
10:29am
Jingjie (NJC friend):"Happy birthday!"
**Rac then takes a break to enjoy my first treat of the day, from two lovely sisters, Sarah and Jeannie who blessed me with a Hillsong songbook and a breakfast treat at Cafe Cartel, dear me blur la, went to the WRONG PLACE! had arrived at CITY Hall instead of PLAZA SING! Can imagine their exasperation! Thanks dear sweeties for putting up with my nonsense! So glad! Jammin'time!**
11:17am
Yuemei(my dear pri sch friend):"hapy birthday! cheers!"
12:48pm
Ah Zhen Ah yee:" :D Hai4 pi2 BIRTHDAY!"
**Rac takes another break to bring family to eat the Holland V XO bee hoon! Slurp Slurp! so full yeah?**
13 14h
Rachel Tan:"Enjoy the day as the nation celebrates with you! happy birtday!!"
13 37h
Rachael Lee:"Happy & Blessed Birthday!May u enjoy another yr of God's blessings! Luv, Rach"
13 45h
Zhiyong:"Happy national day and happy birthday! - Zhiyong :)"
13 47h
John (CJC - Lao ge):"Hey happy birthday 2 u xiaomei! May the Lord bless u and take care. Enjoy urself ya. =)"
14 11h
Karen:"Happy birthday sis! May u be blessed with much more in life! How's celebration gonna be like for u? Enjoy ur special day!"
14 41h
Kim: "Happy Birthday"
15 24h
Jiajun:"Hey babe! Blessed birthday! May e Lord bless this day n year to come.:)"
16 07h
Fenny:"HAPPY BIRTHDAY :)"
16 25h
Ziwei (NTU CEE Buddy):"Hi Rachel. Happy birthday to you! :D"
16 38h
Mingyang:"Happy birthday!"
17 15h
Guang An:" Happy birthday sis. Hope you like the songbook."
**Rac now stuffed to the brim (this is so not doing any good to my thick waistline), rushed down to ah Cheng's place at River Valley for CG...Received a hippo from Mingzhu!**
17 52h
Nizam (NTU CEE Buddy):"my apologies if i'm late, but here's wishing you happy birthday and happy national day!may you have a wonderful year ahead! :)"
**Rac now rushed down to prolly the finaly gathering for the day, of all my old NJC classmates at Serangoon, Wenli's place...**
20 15h
Guang Rong (UL):"As we celebrate National Day, may u also hav a wonderful, memorable and blessed birthday.:)"
21 42h
Pamela:"Happy Birthday once again gal!"
22 06h
Cheng Jie:"before the day is over...happy birthday rachel! hope ya had a memorable 27th hatchday! take care n god bless, as always! ;)"
22 23h
Chukai:"Happy birthday rachel! happy 41st..opps I mean 27th birthday. The Lord bless the year ahead and may he add to you even greater opportunities ahead."
22 30h
Limin:"Hey babe, happy bdae! Stay pretty & cool k."
22 50h
Florence Neo:"Happy birthday Rachel. Just in timeo to wish you.:) May you remain beautiful for God. May your dreams come true. Be strong and courageous for God always - flo"
10/08/06
0900h
Aunt Jo:" Happy belated birthday!"
My apologies to anyone if I have missed out their names in any way..shall blog about my birthday wishes another time!
Thursday, August 24, 2006
Sunday, August 20, 2006
Living an Unhurried Life + "Click" Movie Review
17th August Thursday
Had a very meaningful CG today. CC started with sometime of free time for all of us before the start of the CG. We had like 15 minutes of "free time"!! Something "unorthodox" in a CG setting. I guess I am so used to having "organised time" all the time that for a good 5 minutes plus, I sat there and did not really know what to do after she gave that "command", "15 minutes to do WHATEVER you want."
Things start to rush in my head, shall I read? Shall i talk to Zhuzhu, shall I irritate everyone again by playing on the piano? (yes, we are at Room 306 :P)15 minutes!! Do what you want!!
Then I realise, (took quite a while) its really a short time that we can all gather together and fellowship, immediately dropped my book and went to mingle with the rest...
CC started off that day's sharing on how Jesus modelled an unhurried life by asking us a few questions, that got me tickled and feeling guilty all at the same time.
"Have you ever rushed through your supermarket shopping, by going through the shortest queue even though you are not in a hurry?"
"When driving, have you personally estimated which car would move slower or faster and proceed to change lane to the vehicle which would be the fastest?"
"Have you set yourself a list of "to-dos" for the day and may feel angry or frustrated if you have not completed them?" (Rachel paraphrased this last one...:P)
My answer to the above 3 and a whole host of other questions is mostly a resounding YES! I have the "hurry-sickness"!!
I can't just think of my life as so hurried and in a rush to meet my own deadlines!!
19th August 2006 (Saturday)
Watched the movie "Click" with Jason, Mr D, Peiling yesterday at Bugis, had not watched such a meaningful show for a long time.
Was personally touched by the show. (warning of spoilers ahead, pls dun read on if you dun wan to know the plot!! :P)
The main character, Adam Sandler is an architect and a high flyer who juggles between work and family life like most of us do. One day, when absolutely fed up with quarrelling with his wife and having to care for the needs of his two children.
He went out, met a weird old man in the hardware shop (Christopher Walken) and decided to get a "universal remote".
He was so thrilled with the functions in it that he started to manipulate his life with it. He could actually fast forward, rewind or even skip chapters in parts of his life which he disliked. The turning point came when he decided to fast forward to a quick promotion and realised that the remote actually went on auto-pilot, capturing his most favourite function which is to "fast forward".He realised that he missed out. Big time.
His kids' growing up years, his relationship with his father and wife were all compromised for the sake of fame only then, till near his death did he realise precious time wasted. But the turning point came when he was given a second chance and decided to treasure family time more.
That show really struck me, it's like a really meaningful show after "50-first dates" which also touched me.
I wanted so badly to really drop down my stuff and run home to hug my sisters, my parents, especially my daddy and baby sis.
I was so afraid of missing out. Missing out of their lives when I am here zooming past here mine. I reallyhope I do not already make my time shorten further when its already moving at such a face pace.
I want to be there: when my younger sis needs a listening ear, be there when my dad wants a willing girl to cut fruits for him after dinner, be there for my mum when she wants someone to help her with her English, be there for my friends, be there for my dearly loved sheep and shepherd, be there to pray if I am so tied up, be there for GOD when HE calls me...,
Time, a precious commodity.
*** *** *** *** ***
We ended our CG discussion,"Jesus was always busy but never in a hurry." He took time to seek and pray to the Lord even when He was surrounded by so many needs and requests.
Praying for a more effective time and more of God's grace for time spent with my family members and friends and to most importantly slow down, give thanks to the Lord and refocus...
Maybe I shall choose to walk and wait instead of taking that cab or bus one day eh?
:P
Had a very meaningful CG today. CC started with sometime of free time for all of us before the start of the CG. We had like 15 minutes of "free time"!! Something "unorthodox" in a CG setting. I guess I am so used to having "organised time" all the time that for a good 5 minutes plus, I sat there and did not really know what to do after she gave that "command", "15 minutes to do WHATEVER you want."
Things start to rush in my head, shall I read? Shall i talk to Zhuzhu, shall I irritate everyone again by playing on the piano? (yes, we are at Room 306 :P)15 minutes!! Do what you want!!
Then I realise, (took quite a while) its really a short time that we can all gather together and fellowship, immediately dropped my book and went to mingle with the rest...
CC started off that day's sharing on how Jesus modelled an unhurried life by asking us a few questions, that got me tickled and feeling guilty all at the same time.
"Have you ever rushed through your supermarket shopping, by going through the shortest queue even though you are not in a hurry?"
"When driving, have you personally estimated which car would move slower or faster and proceed to change lane to the vehicle which would be the fastest?"
"Have you set yourself a list of "to-dos" for the day and may feel angry or frustrated if you have not completed them?" (Rachel paraphrased this last one...:P)
My answer to the above 3 and a whole host of other questions is mostly a resounding YES! I have the "hurry-sickness"!!
I can't just think of my life as so hurried and in a rush to meet my own deadlines!!
*** *** *** *** *** ***
19th August 2006 (Saturday)
Watched the movie "Click" with Jason, Mr D, Peiling yesterday at Bugis, had not watched such a meaningful show for a long time.
Was personally touched by the show. (warning of spoilers ahead, pls dun read on if you dun wan to know the plot!! :P)
The main character, Adam Sandler is an architect and a high flyer who juggles between work and family life like most of us do. One day, when absolutely fed up with quarrelling with his wife and having to care for the needs of his two children.
He went out, met a weird old man in the hardware shop (Christopher Walken) and decided to get a "universal remote".
He was so thrilled with the functions in it that he started to manipulate his life with it. He could actually fast forward, rewind or even skip chapters in parts of his life which he disliked. The turning point came when he decided to fast forward to a quick promotion and realised that the remote actually went on auto-pilot, capturing his most favourite function which is to "fast forward".He realised that he missed out. Big time.
His kids' growing up years, his relationship with his father and wife were all compromised for the sake of fame only then, till near his death did he realise precious time wasted. But the turning point came when he was given a second chance and decided to treasure family time more.
That show really struck me, it's like a really meaningful show after "50-first dates" which also touched me.
I wanted so badly to really drop down my stuff and run home to hug my sisters, my parents, especially my daddy and baby sis.
I was so afraid of missing out. Missing out of their lives when I am here zooming past here mine. I reallyhope I do not already make my time shorten further when its already moving at such a face pace.
I want to be there: when my younger sis needs a listening ear, be there when my dad wants a willing girl to cut fruits for him after dinner, be there for my mum when she wants someone to help her with her English, be there for my friends, be there for my dearly loved sheep and shepherd, be there to pray if I am so tied up, be there for GOD when HE calls me...,
Time, a precious commodity.
*** *** *** *** ***
We ended our CG discussion,"Jesus was always busy but never in a hurry." He took time to seek and pray to the Lord even when He was surrounded by so many needs and requests.
Praying for a more effective time and more of God's grace for time spent with my family members and friends and to most importantly slow down, give thanks to the Lord and refocus...
Maybe I shall choose to walk and wait instead of taking that cab or bus one day eh?
:P
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