Embarrassing moments again!!

Gotta share with u all something really farnie today...

I was wearing this emprire cut/ baby doll top to work today..so very airy around the tummy area lah...so i stood near the "handicap" seat on the MRT reading my Bible and having a great time reading Colossians 1:11-12a.

Then ah...the train jerked and "air" seemed to get under my top, creating a momentary "pregnant" look as i lost my balance. The lady who was sleeping in the seat in front of me...suddenly jerked up and stood up immediately to offer me the seat!!!

ARGHHHHH!

I pretend not to see her do that and then this lady who was standing beside me..suddenly plonked down on the seat being offered and went "Thank you ah, Thank you ah!"

aiyoh.....*red light warning to lose some weight!!!* so embarrassing!!

:S

Changing Directions, Changing Gear

Think this song just ran through my head ..waahhaha no wonder i am so tired..wooo hoo brain activity yeah? Finally down to some exercise!! Will sing it out to you all when i see you all! :) written in the office again woo hooo...:P

This song aptly describes my emotions and feelings this period of time when I am in the midst of changing jobs and letting go of my past hurts..so decided to pen this down in a song...recorded the excerpt of it in my MP3 player..:P
TIME: 345pm, added a Bridge to my song...)

CHANGING DIRECTIONS

Verse 1

Lord I look upon Your countenance, Your beau-tiful face

And You bring me peace and comfort by the fullness of Your Grace

I was lost and misguided when I look to my own desires

But You came and pull me back from all those lies.

Verse 2

Pretty things and wonderful toys, all the things that hold me down

I find it hard to sur-render to You when all these that keep me bound

Then I heard You calling to me, telling me that You love me more

Free-ing me from these chains Lord You restore!

CHORUS:

Lord I am chang-ing directions, to find the path that You have lead me,

No longer wandering in my wil-ful-ness

Draw from Your Grace I don't deserve


Lord I am chang-ing directions, when I put You fore my life,

And I find the peace that fills me through,

And The Word that brings the light to me,

Lord, when I changed my heart.....

BRIDGE:

All the paths that I trod,

And all the roads that I took,

Could not measure to Your perfect plan for me,

It's Your face, It's Your Grace (x2)

Everyuthing that I need it's in You..

(Back to Chorus)

Its the EXAMS time for NTU!-7th Nov 2005

My dear "di di" Timo! wahah a series of shots that captures our
expressions~
The gang of us who went back at TR 130 and Seminar Room 9
Da Rachel and Xiao Rachel
NTU New believer joining us for the first time!!
Eileen, you are my only love!! miss you loads!!

Went back with a group of bros and sis who had moved on to Adults group..everything is so surreal..its just a few months ago i was with them..in this very same room Seminar room 9 mugging for my last few papers....Patrick, Guoqiang, Shen Teng, Peiru, Sharon, Patrick, Hoe Ping, Ye Xiang, Qiuyan, Huan Jie, all went together..

We bought lots of food and groceries from the supermarket, coffee, cake biscuits, "liang teh"..
These are the brothers and sisters who have been with me in my study days in NTU and how i really missed the privilege of always able to meet up every day! reminded me of the days when the whole of YA would come and bless the NTU community wahahah....

That is when i know i must learn to grow up..wahahh part of me still with them la..really encouraged to see God move in the land of NTU..having poured out 7 new babies into the group!
We were so discouraged at one point when all the graduates had moved on there would be no one left in the group...thank God for this outpouring of His grace and once again showed how wonderful it is when we moved and worked together with God in outreaching lost souls...Indeed it was really encouraging to see New believers joining the study group and share lives together!

How wonderful is fellowship..stayed for quite a while and really prayed for those who were having papers..NTU "ni yao jia you oh"!!

You Stand Alone

YOU STAND ALONE

I will lay me down

At Your feet in worship

And listen to the

Sweetest sound of all


Oh GOD You are my God

How my heart it longs for You

I'm thirsty for Your presence

In my world


I cry out night and day for more

To HOLD the majesty of YOU


MY God YOU STAND ALONE

And I worship at Your throne

I will look to see

Your power and glory

Jesus Lord of all

Jesus Lord of ALL.....

Battery NOT included!!

Story of a gal and a battery in her wallet..

she looked through her wallet the other day... this battery still sits in the coin compartment of her wallet...why does she carry a battery you would say?

Two months ago, a gal full of dreams of expectations had splurged all her money on preparation for violin exams. All that she had ever saved or earned those few months had went into the exam. The hiring of the pianist, the music lessons, the paying of the exam fees itself, the booking of the music studio to rehearse...for those few months she's really broke, scrimped on meals and stuff...so for a good two months, being so broke, she could not even afford to buy batteries for her MP3 player.

The MP3 player is absolutely essential to the musio, she would really need to really listen to the songs that are often given last minute and to figure out the chords and what to play for her violin part. Cos most of the songs do not have strings interlude in them.

So then, came one day that someone asked if she could pass all her digital photos to him for him to compile, all the photogs like to pool our photos together often we would have a good laugh at what we saw in those pictures from other units...:) of course we would share them out lah...:P Having no thumbdrive, her MP3 player serves as a detachable thumbdrive. So then this gal uploaded all her photos and passed to this someone, the MP3 player. He was shocked that she had passed him her precious MP3 player.

"You don't need to listen meh? You on duty right?"

"It's okay lah, I don't have money to buy the batteries anyway...upload already pass back to me okay?"

On duty that Sunday, the gal gets back her MP3 player and put it aside, since its a thumbdrive, the gal could pluck it out and plug it in the USB port of her computer to save on batteries!!....wahahh you would think of all the ways to save money when you are absolutely broke!

Finally got some money to buy a cheapo pack of batteries, opened the battery compartment and VOLA! There's this really "higher end" battery sitting in the player. "Eh, i dun use this brand lei, how come got this battery in the compartment?" She pressed the "ON" button, it worked...

Finally, it dawned on her, tears started to flow down her cheeks like a silly little gal...she MSN that someone whom refused to tell her where the battery come from..

"If its not you who put the battery in then it must be an ANGEL..."

"The ANGEL knows that you have no money to buy batteries, bless you with a titanium battery, lasts way longer than the normal alkaline ones.."

The gal's tears flowed, silly gal, simple acts of kindness like that do touch her, how much does God love her to grant her such small gifts to show that He cared!

For a good few months, the gal looked up to the "ANGEL" a lot, shared a lot of things to her "angel"....looking back the girl is glad that she's finally stepping outta the emotional rollercoaster ride..

Was digging into her wallet, saw the battery again, she had put it there cos she could not bear to use the gift from her "angel"....Finally took it out today, not to think about it again ..waved the battery about and told GOD about her wallet and hence forth her emotional baggage during what she would call the mini "dark ages" of her life...

"Dear LORD, Battery NOT included this time!......."

:)

Paradise Worship Seminar 2nd and 3rd Nov 2005!!

The guitarist together with the drummer, very cool rifts and coordination among the band members..they really gel together and very very tight as a band..:P
Our young aspiring drummer, Nicholas!! hee hee love this boy...worship leader Ah Long's son..:)

With Olie Sebastian and Anna Bunton..:) Olie conducted my Songwriting workshop and Anna was leading the Worship Leading workshop...really nice and friendly people...:)
Our young star..:) dun disturb me i am on duty!!! :P
Paradise Worship team came to Singapore!

have the privilege to talk to the band members to serve at the concerts and take photo with the band members! really really cool!

Loved Olie Sebastian and Pastor Paul Zaia! The worship was great too, the singers wowed the crowd with their lovely voice, the female worship leader, Anna Bunton sang very well too...
He gave a very heart warming sharing on how to write good songs for the house of the Lord and also how as musios, our passion for the Lord must be greater than the passion that we have of our skills..every word spoke to me and also he could really understand the heart of musios when we serve in a frontline ministry like that...the songs they sing are great! We have been singing of their songs for some time liao wor...example "Shout to the Lord" "You Laid Aside Your Majesty.." wahhah and we thought it was sung by the Hillsongs people!..:) they were really good stage ministers and ppl were not just awed by their voices and skills but really the anointing that flows from them and the presence of God was really great that day..

****Pssst will ushers get our rewards soon? hee hee hee...

Will share about what i learnt in another entry..enjoy some photos yeah?

Forrest Gump's Feather!!

It was one of thoes rare and lazy afternoons last Saturday i guess...i was sitting on my couch at home munching a banana...and would u believe it....asking God at the same time about my life..praying to God that He would speak to me more and reveal my weakness...why am i so emotional?

sigh....those lazy afternoons where you wanna do anything but just daydream..but this day is different...God was showing me all those flashbacks of my last few months..the mistakes that I have made...of course the joy and laughter shared...then my thoughts fall on......well......that someone and the particular phase where i was so emotionally affected...and would you believe it? When I was praying to God to heal me and to reveal to me my purpose and future...a feather fell to my shoulder! a small white sweet feather...macham Forrest Gump when he opened his book in the movie and the feather flew out.....

It was like a very sweet moment and I felt as if an angel with wings was with me at that moment...listening to me and really comforting me....all this happening when i was praying and thinking about sigh....and you would think that "aiyah that silly Rachel, sit there whole day think of that only.." To me its a comforting thought from God that He heals my hurts and fulfills my needs...my rest of the day was basked in love just with God at how beautiful He chose to reveal about my life and His plans for me bit by bit...rather than a huge torchlight to immediately reveal all things...its was like a warm lamp showing bits slowly..:)

The song "Under the Shadow of Your Wings" began to play in my mind...

" Under the Shadow of Your wings, I will fly ..."

Lovely verse today!! (From KIM)

This verse today has touched me...another round of testing from God...yeah holding on tightly to God now..no where i can turn to le..:)

"Happy are those who are like trees that grow beside a stream, that bear fruit at the right time, and whose leaves do not dry up. They succeed in everything they do" ~ Psalm 1:3

Praying that we would always be beside the living streams of our Lord the Saviour who would always give us strength...:)

6th Nov 2005-Sunday

I know the TRUTH,

My heart is HEALED,

My strength is in YOU.

I know the TRUTH,

Its done already,

The TRUTH has set me FREE.......

Comm Care Event 29th October 2005

Called to host again..

Punggol Primary School.

Its a really hot and scorching day..something in my heart draws me back to the school compound, it suddenly feels good to be in the company of kids again after the 6 month stint as a relief teacher..

Is is You Lord? DO you want me to be a teacher? Need the confirmation...can't see the future...
my current job is ending soon...i can feel it even if my boss dun tell me about my contract renewal...
The kids...loved them, a few of them remembered me from the first Comm care event that we had in June, the sweet little Malay girl who's really on and Chinese girl called Yilin...

Love to be in the company of kids, played and chatted with some of them...

Helped Poy tie the balloon sculptures, another Indian kid Vickes comes along....my heart just wanna go out and cuddle her and to show love to her as i watched her play the balloons in a childlike manner..:) ....hey in case any ppl out there thinking..this is not a warped mind speaking wahah...

I am born into okay lah....slightly more privilege than the others, think it would take me a while to understand their plight and their family background their pain and their plight...each would have a story to tell...the hosting went well, my co-host Zhen Min really had to talk as if we are talking to kids ...going down to their levels so that the kids will understand....

Compassion for the kids grew in my heart...this day is for them Lord! I hope to bring too some joy in the lives! think i screamed louder than the kids during the games, playing with them really warms my heart..

What's this tugging of the heart? Is it the calling of a teacher?

I have never felt this before...

sigh ..saw the someone again...how long more will this someone keep swimming in my mind like that? ..its a good 2 long months le....Lord Jesus set me free....

some of my photos..:)

Aiyoh...if forced to take picture i will give this silly face lor..:P at a blood donation in July??
Then, with the lovely Angela and Peiqi!!
The next two taken from my cousin's wedding recently with my model younger cousin, Pern Ren....wahahah look like family shot.
The last... all my favourite "tang di di" heee very cute but naughty boys..

My Violin Exam results!! 12th October 2005

Barely one month after my fateful violin exam....

There i saw the very familiar Singapore Symphony Orchestra envelop..

THIS IS IT....

remembering my trauma all those years ago when i was still a young girl of 13, when i sat for the exact same grade 5 violin exam...i failed that time and it was really a trigger point for me cos then, my mum STOPPED me from learning violin from my teacher then..somewhere in my heart BROKE.

I had just come back from the Missions Training Night and my heart was really prepared to see the envelop...

THIS IS IT...

I fell down on my knees and pray.."Whatever happens Lord, Whatever is behind this envelop, this time round ITS YOURS O Lord, Its YOURS, for YOUR Glory and for YOU, may I be always thankful for what You have given me be it good or bad, pray also for Your mercy to be on me...I just want to PASS! "

Its like its taking forever to open the envelop...i tore open the envelop and CANNOT believe my eyes...I had passed , not just a pass but with DISTINCTION~!!!!

oh my gosh? for a good long moment i was stunned....i took my calculator (engineering blood still in me) counted the marks...re- add them all up..130 upon 150!! WOW God!! THANK YOU! The comments that the examiner had written were really flattering too! Sure or not?

I cannot believe what God has given me! Prayed a prayer of thanksgiving and could not contain myself...jumped up and down....sms-ed all my dear friends immediately after that...my sheep, my shepherd...my violin teacher Lester, my accompanist Salome...

When i showed my mum the next morning she also went..."SURE or not? Liddat also can ah?" hahah JEANNIE, i can totally relate to you about your mum!!!

All this is part of the miracle that God had prepared for me...I was really pressed for time...remembering all the times when I had to carry Anthony to practice in the void deck of Bras Brasah Complex for a number of weeks after work,even arriving early before CG days to book the room and play... practised only 3 times with my accompanist cos i ahave no money to hire her for more....forgot my scales on the actual day..WOW God! YOUR LOVE IS AMAZING!

only You could write such a beautiful story O Lord! i dedicate this exam result and my skills which You have blessed me to You and Your house alone!

Missions Training Night

12th October 2005

Today is the day when our team gathered for the Missions Training at IBMEC.
Really wanted to go into the missions field for years now....ever since 2002! hahah money has always been a huge factor for me...can't go due to financial difficulties...heee ..well this is finally the chance to go! i signed up for the trip during on the "Friends of South America" night with Teck Keong and told me about my interest to go and to expose my self to local culture.

I had spent a few days praying and also to hear from God how He would lead me and guide me in this...there are many obstacles...my leave lah, my parents lah...funding is not a problem this time round....cos ah working already mah hee...

Entered in the room, saw my team members for the first time...really glad to be able to cos dun know how long i have waited for this day. Teck Keong is our team leader, we have Keng Suan, Addy, Jasmine, Doreen, Jeremy and myself.:)

We did spiritual giftings test and found out a little of our group's dynamics hee very interesting to know how different members actually go there with a slight difference in expectations , but could really see all of us having a heart for missions and to do God's work..:)

Da Jian Ming showed us videos and clips from the previous missions trips from our District, the Pretchabun trip, the trip that Poy and Cryst they all went..Patrick came up and shared about their experiences there and how they themselves were personally blessed by the group and the people there.

I am personally inspired..Jian Ming told us to "rough it out" ....living in a very comfortable home and having almost everything that i wanted...this is what i want to go to experience to touch the lives of the local people, to learn about their culture and to spread the love of GOD!

We gathered after that at the S11 foodcourt, actually a lot of uncertainties still lingered in our team; there were no responses from the Indo church whether we could enter there, our leave approval esp for the only teacher in our group, Jeremy, parents' approval and also lots of other factors, we set aside time to really pray, fast and to seek GOD..want to make this trip happen not just for us but for GOD...:)

We were all very excited, set aside mini tasks on what we want to do for the trip, prepare Indo praise and worship? hahah research on notes how to share and be culturally relevant? whaha all these really serve an important part in the preparation in leading up to the trip itself, pray also for our heart conditions to be ready and at ease with God..:)

Lord, You gotta make this trip HAPPEN! :)